Been reading through old stuff

[midnightphoenix]

And I now have the thought that everyone on this forum is angry/disappointed at me

i know i'ma bad member

 

[Parayana]

You come accross as a nice, kind person Phoenix, it's just your inner critic talking telling you your bad, in non-violent communication they call it the Jackal, everyones got one - it's just usually more pronounced in people with MH problems.

 

[midnightphoenix]

You come accross as a nice, kind person Phoenix, it's just your inner critic talking telling you your bad, in non-violent communication they call it the Jackal, everyones got one - it's just usually more pronounced in people with MH problems.

the jackal? can I call it a swear word instead?

 

[Parayana]

You can call it whatever you like buddy, can I call this stupid virtual keyboard that keeps popping up on Xbox a swear word, despite the fact I've got a conventional keyboard plugged in.

 

[midnightphoenix]

You can call it whatever you like buddy, can I call this stupid virtual keyboard that keeps popping up on Xbox a swear word, despite the fact I've got a conventional keyboard plugged in.

yep you can, i think we can swear on this forum so we can fill this thread up with swear words until the mods lock the thread up in thread jail i think

 

[Fairy Lucretia]

I am not angry or disappointed at you
you are not a bad member
you are one of my best friends on here
love you sweetie
Lu xxxx

 

[gam9147]

 

[Lunar Lady]

You're a bundle of love and we couldn't bear to be without you, Midnight.

You are my favourite reason to log on xx

 

[Muddleduck]

The past is the past. I don't know you but i am sure you have done nothing worse than anybody else. I have done bad stuff and said bad stuff but that was the past.

We need to keep moving forwards and keep improving as we go. Don't look back too much. Acknowledge to yourself what has happened and why, then move on, being better/more well, as you go.

 

[midnightphoenix]

I mean, my mental health issues started when I went through a breakup (short version of what happened), since him I have not had a relationship and know I am too damaged by mental illness now

 

[wolram]

I mean, my mental health issues started when I went through a breakup (short version of what happened), since him I have not had a relationship and know I am too damaged by mental illness now

Aww poor phoenix, I am sure there is some one out there for you

 

[midnightphoenix]

Aww poor phoenix, I am sure there is some one out there for you

doubt it but thanks woolie

irl as soon as anyone knows there's anything wrong with me they run like i'm going to murder them or something idk

 

[midnightphoenix]

your going to all be angry at me now

did a bad thing twice to myself tonight

 

[gam9147]

Hi midnight,

I don't know so much of your past as I haven't been around long, but I understand how your feeling. My wife told me she wanted a divorce, my confidence has been shattered since. I've only had a handful of relationships in my life and each of them ended with my significant other 'running off' so to speak. They seem to find new people aweful fast, it took me 6 years last time and I have little confidence this time even though it hasn't been long yet.

I try to remind myself its OK to be alone, in fact I think I may just have a fear of being alone so even just working on being alone seems worthwhile.

I hope that helps my friend.

 

[linus]

What did you do to yourself?

 

[Muddleduck]

You have that little cat there? I bet he/she was so sad to know that you were in distress. They can sense that i think. Whenever i felt in too much distress, i would lay down by my cat and stroke her. They can really calm you.

I don't have a partner and always felt too damaged like you say you are, but years later, i think i would make a good girlfriend or wife. I cannot cope with the children thing or a full life but there is someone i am sure, who is similar to me or would like to have me for company, one day. If not, it is fine, there are always cats just go with life wherever it takes you and don't worry about what you don't have.

 

[midnightphoenix]

What did you do to yourself?

self harmed twice

 

[linus]

Are you ok? Could we help in any way?

 

[midnightphoenix]

You have that little cat there? I bet he/she was so sad to know that you were in distress. They can sense that i think. Whenever i felt in too much distress, i would lay down by my cat and stroke her. They can really calm you.

I don't have a partner and always felt too damaged like you say you are, but years later, i think i would make a good girlfriend or wife. I cannot cope with the children thing or a full life but there is someone i am sure, who is similar to me or would like to have me for company, one day. If not, it is fine, there are always cats just go with life wherever it takes you and don't worry about what you don't have.

my older furbaby is fast asleep on top of a box filled with random junk (idk how she finds that comfortable!)

not sure where my younger one has decided to go for a snooze, maybe snuggling her teddy in her carrier idk

 

[midnightphoenix]

ok younger furbaby has decided to come onto my lap for a minute