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Been a battle for 28 years with no medication

J

JCPraha

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Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
Hello Mark. It is good that the ulcers are not cancerous. It is great you are continuing with treatment. You have so many things going on at the same time. Your medical problems, divorce court, deaths in your family. It is a really lot to cope with. Life is so difficult. I am fighting my own battles as well. My mental state is up and down, relationship problems, financial problems, the list goes on. The war certainly does go on. I think it will be difficult until the day I die. Nothing seems to be getting easier. The worst problem is when I am in a bad mental state, it is like torture.

It sounds like you are coping with the situation well, given how difficult it is. I am happy for that and glad to here from you. You are persevering. That is good. I am happy to get a message from you. Take care of yourself and please update me on how things are going. Take care Mark.
 
J

JCPraha

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Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
None of us have so much control over both our physical and mental health. It is quite difficult to cope with both at the same time. I suppose it is the way things go as we get older. More problems to deal with. Take care Mark. I always hope and pray for the best for you.
 
J

John32john

Active member
Joined
Oct 27, 2019
Messages
27
Location
USA
Ive been struggling with no medication for 33 years( im 33). Once i tried medication and it made things worse so i stopped. Im prabably the craziest person online. I used to pray to god : someday somehow somewhen someway god will take my anxiety away. I gave up most hope that it will ever happen at around 30. Anxiety kept getting worst and worst. At age 32 i gave up all hope. And realized my misarble fate. My health was became very poor and i was in agony all night every night. And most of my days. I decided to read the bible again. I randomly opened to the place where it says i am the lord your god and i heal all your diseases. So i prayed and told god how is it possible. I had so may things wrong with me. Days later death was looking straight in my face. I could no longer sleep. Agony would grip me From head to toe everytime i closed my eyes and every time i closed my eyes and tried to sleep. Instead of of healing i had death creeping on me night after night. I became suicidal with no hope of sleeping because of my brain would stop sending signals to breath. I broke down crying at night when i wanted to comit suicide repenting of all my evil that lives in me. Immedietly After i prayed I went online and did research on what is wrong with me and why my exiety and stomach keeps getting worse... as i have been doing for the last year or so...but just this time coincidently on i landed on something ive never read before: PARASTIES. i decided to give it a shot. I got reeves pinworm medication used to kill pinworms....turns out i had a SEVERE parasite infestation but more so of hook worms.VERRY DANGEROUS FOR HUMANS. reeves pinworm medication happens to kill hookworms also. Ive been treating my self succsefully over the last for months and and my health is 90 percent better except my psoriosis has not gone away.
 
J

JCPraha

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
Hello Mark! What has been happening? I haven't heard anything from you for a while. Are your ulcers any better now? Let us know how you are. Take care. I am hoping for the best for you.
 
J

JCPraha

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
Hello Mark! We have not heard from you for a long time? Are you ok? Can you give an update? I am hoping for the best for you. Please let me know how you are doing. I have been thinking of you.
 
madmark

madmark

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Oct 25, 2011
Messages
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Location
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hi sorry about the long delay my divorce went through but now stuck with finacial settlement so it looks like i will have to sell my house and the sh*t just doesent stop hope u ok james and managing ok me myself i just keep losing myself all thats gone on and going on it just doesent end ime still having therapy every monday but just so much crap still ongoing its not having any good effect on me ime just feeling lost and traped in a situation out of my control and ime so so worried not sure i be on here before xmas and new year so will wish u all happy xmas and all the best for 2020 and james please stay focused over the festive season its a difficult time for us all alot goes on take care and i will just try to plod along best i can at the moment
 
J

JCPraha

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Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
I am sure you are worried. You have been going through so many terrible things. Deaths, divorce, now the financial consequences of divorce, taking your home away from you. I am not sure what else can go wrong. I remember you also had some health problems you were trying to cope with. I don't know how you can deal with it all. I have my own problems of course. My wife is divorcing me, my ongoing mental health and physical problems, not sure how I will survive either. Not even sure where, or how I will live.

I really hope there can be an end to these problems for you. It seems like one bad thing after another keeps happening. Having to sell your house and find somewhere else to live has to be very difficult for you. It is enough to make anyone depressed.

I really hope things can improve for you, somehow. It sounds like the near future will be extremely difficult.

I am happy to hear from you. Take care, I am thinking of you.
 
madmark

madmark

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Oct 25, 2011
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james i feel for u buddy ive taken so much bad 1 after the other and no time between them to heal myself i am cracking under the pressure rabbit in headlights comes to mind not sure what way to turn and my head is just a jumbled mess of sad depressing problems no positivs and more negative in the new year with losing my home cant cope with it all now its cracked me to my inner core now
 
J

JCPraha

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Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
I can perfectly understand, Mark. You have really had a very bad streak. Anyone would have difficulty coping with it. Mental health problems are very bad to begin with, and then all of these terrible things that are happening to you. Divorce never seems to turn out well. There is always a big penalty to pay, both financially and emotionally. I have experienced it more than once. It took a terrible toll on me. I hope and pray both of us can find some kind of rest and peace from this madness, but it doesn't look like it is going to be better in the near future, at leas not for me, and it sounds like it will be difficult for you as well. I am thinking of you. Take care.
 
madmark

madmark

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Oct 25, 2011
Messages
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ok sorry about the long time out been sorting out my head and personal problems at current i am still having counseling now once a week and yes even though it seems like another chore in my head it seems to be helping me manage and learn about my grief its all new to me but along side its also helping me focus my mental health so ime in a better place the 31st of jan was 1 year since my mum passed then the 2nd feb was her birthday so once again trying times but made it through i've learnt so much some with outside help but most of all i think by my self once again . i not heard back from the hospital as of yet regarding my next tests on my throat but i guess i will at any time . my divorce financial settlement is still ongoing time will tell . regarding me christmas and new year came and went as it does lol i'm still working full time and just trying to manage my mental health best i can and not let things wind me up or drag me down deal with the hear and now this is helping me loads and thank you jcpraha for your comments and support hope u are well and managing the same as i am i fully understand how difficult life is but the best thing i learnt is try not to dwell on the past and don't try to sort things that haven't happened by this i mean worry about the future you got there 1st then deal with it try to live for the day your in or even the minute your in at worse times if you need to be busy to help your mind be busy but also remember to rest or in the end your body will make the time for you and you will become ill i feel i have been running in flight or fight mode for best part of 2 years or longer and my counselor also agrees to this / heart rate high / aggression high / anxiety levels high / depression levels high /mind racing over and over and lack of sleep never truly knowing if i'm coming or going but pushing through now i feel and hope i've managed to slow things down and open myself up a little once again to learn and heal my wounds also regain some focus on my life still so much going on in my life but it all seems more manageable now anyway enough for now just like to wish you all the strength to find your way through bad times and the energy to pick yourself back up if you fall all the best mark // will update again soon//
 
J

JCPraha

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Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
Hello Mark,

It sounds like you are doing much better. You said you are working full time again, so you must be doing well because it takes a lot of strength and energy to work. I haven't been doing so well. Meds don't work so well for me so I am in a psych hospital trying ECT (shock) therapy. I heard it helps many people. It is kind of a last resort for me because I have been feeling so terrible. Very depressed and anxious. Very difficult to carry on.

You have been through so much, and somehow you are able to survive it and keep your head together. It is amazing. I think you are a survivor. You keep going no matter how bad things get, and they have been extremely bad for you over the last couple of years.

You are right, sometimes I just have to take things one day at a time. It is hard for me to plan anything for the longer term because my mental state is up and down. Sometimes I am able to think and do things and other times when I sink down low, I'm not able to do anything.

But, I am glad you are doing better. Things are quite difficult for me right now. I will see what happens. Hopefully, this treatment will help. I know that you are quite strong and you don't need any meds or treatments, which is great! I wish I could do the same.

Take care Mark. I am happy to hear from you again and glad that you are doing better. Take care of yourself and keep up the good fight.
 
madmark

madmark

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Oct 25, 2011
Messages
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Location
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Hello Mark,

It sounds like you are doing much better. You said you are working full time again, so you must be doing well because it takes a lot of strength and energy to work. I haven't been doing so well. Meds don't work so well for me so I am in a psych hospital trying ECT (shock) therapy. I heard it helps many people. It is kind of a last resort for me because I have been feeling so terrible. Very depressed and anxious. Very difficult to carry on.

You have been through so much, and somehow you are able to survive it and keep your head together. It is amazing. I think you are a survivor. You keep going no matter how bad things get, and they have been extremely bad for you over the last couple of years.

You are right, sometimes I just have to take things one day at a time. It is hard for me to plan anything for the longer term because my mental state is up and down. Sometimes I am able to think and do things and other times when I sink down low, I'm not able to do anything.

But, I am glad you are doing better. Things are quite difficult for me right now. I will see what happens. Hopefully, this treatment will help. I know that you are quite strong and you don't need any meds or treatments, which is great! I wish I could do the same.

Take care Mark. I am happy to hear from you again and glad that you are doing better. Take care of yourself and keep up the good fight.
great to hear from u james and so sorry you still at such a low point and when i say i know how you feel i do its not just a saying and i also know there is not a lot i can about the situation but i so hope you find some comfort and piece from this new treatment you trying me myself i just found i have to tackle it face on and over come it best i can as meds just dont work on me at all so no real choice from my early years but we all have different battles different scars different lifes so i dont preach i just try to understand and be there best i can you do what you have to do to keep going on in life and i pray for you my friend to give you strength and piece with in you all the best mark
 
J

JCPraha

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
Hello Mark,

Thank you for your encouragement. I feel very low now. It is difficult to carry on, but I'm trying anything I can to try to get some relief. I'm not sure how long I will be able to carry on, but I keep trying. I know that you understand how it feels to be at a low point, you've been through so much. Maybe I need to get out of this country. It is driving me crazy listening to all these languages I do not understand.

Take care of yourself. I'm glad you are doing better. You find a way through the most difficult circumstances. I don't know how you do it!

Take care of yourself. James
 
madmark

madmark

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Oct 25, 2011
Messages
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Location
uk
just run with it james try not to fight it or act on it i do understand and if u been at a very low point for so long i always find its time to submit and stop the battle quite life down as much as possible and clear the mind as much as possible to give your brain/mind time to self heal would normaly say stay focused but i understand at points like this focus is not to good as its all negative deep with in i just seem to shut myself down for as long as it takes to start to clear then battle once again take care of yourself mate
 
J

JCPraha

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Joined
Aug 27, 2018
Messages
632
Thanks for your advice Mark. It's a difficult battle. I think I am starting to change things in my life, hopefully for the better. I am in a psych hospital now. I am trying this ECT - electric shock treatment, since meds don't work for me any more. I am desperate for anything that may help. I have been feeling so low. Very difficult to live with. I think you are right. I need to quiet things down and try to live a more peaceful life for a while. Shut down. Give the brain time to heal itself. Good to hear from you and thanks for your advice. Your Friend, James
 
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