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BED: listened to at last

catkin

catkin

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Binged for two decades.
No help with it, despite asking.
Today I saw a worker who actually knows what they're talking about.
They didn't tell me I just need to stop eating, or that I'm lazy.
I don't know if these few sessions will work, am not supposed to talk about why I do this???, but am grateful that the ED is acknowledged.
 
Gajolene

Gajolene

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I don't know if these few sessions will work, am not supposed to talk about why I do this???, but am grateful that the ED is acknowledged.
Did she give you any reasoning as to why your not supposed to talk about it?:confused: Glad she acknowledged and validated it for you anyway. It must be a weight lifted off your shoulders to a certain extent anyway.
 
catkin

catkin

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Thanks Gajolene, I'm supposed to wait until safe for therapy but it's all mixed up,feel I can't separate the bingeing out (it's a trauma response) but will have to try. Yes, validated is how I feel I think. X
 
Gajolene

Gajolene

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Well if you have the need to talk about it, and can't wait for the therapists appointment, I think it safer to talk on here than with family or people around work, mates and such. Don't think they have the same kind of understanding and compassion as we do on here personally and they tend to give out really bad advice when they have no understanding. God don't know if I could not talk at all about my MH unless it was in therapy only. I have to wait months between appointments many times. Sometimes I just have to get it out and be heard. I just can't see holding it in as beneficial myself. But then what do I know, I'm just a survivor myself.
 
catkin

catkin

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Ty again, no I can't talk safely about it,but if it's not let out I don't see how to heal. Hard to wait so long between appts, I'm sorry xx
 
prairiechick

prairiechick

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I'm glad you feel heard and understood, catkin. It's been a long, hard road for you.
 
catkin

catkin

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She is good. I am skinless, realising how much I need to binge to manage, to be safe.
Confronting myself, hardest thing yet. I'm not good.
 
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Helena1

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I am so glad to hear you know have some support with your eating. i hope it helps in the end.
 
catkin

catkin

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marvinuncleherbs said:
One of the best thing that into our lives is to get support from our families and close friends, that's priceless and nothing can compare.
Depends on the family and whether one has friends to talk to
 
catkin

catkin

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This is so f***ing hard, PTSD stuff all tangled up with why binge, am so close to harming to find numbness again. So full of shame.
 
Gajolene

Gajolene

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It's a vicious cycle isn't it Catkin, for years I binged alcohol to try to control/stop the flashbacks and depression, only to have the guilt of the binging drive me back into depression, flashbacking and wanting to binge again. It's such a hard cycle to break out of. Huge huge hugs.
 
catkin

catkin

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Thank you, it is awful and I feel for you going through similar too. There feels no escape, that drives the urges further. X
 
catkin

catkin

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I can't do this, am sh and bingeing, cant stop it, feels impossible. It cant be but that's how it feels to my core. One comment that an abuser made circles, anxiety rushing, trying to drown him out. No excuse, need to get beyond this but I don't know how when can't acknowledge the reasons this started.
have another appt tomorrow, am so ashamed of the failure. My talk of being determined and ready etc is shite.
 
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