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Back to self harming/pain meds **trig suicide**

S

so sad

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 24, 2016
Messages
167
So after a few months of not self harming I'm back on it. I'm in a dreadful place and hurting myself gives me a break from it.
I have issues at home with a controlling partner, I hate myself and have no real support.

I want to die because I can't see a way through this but it would devastate my parents and I can't do that to them. I'm hoping to be in some sort of fatal accident so its not my fault.

xx
 
Acorn

Acorn

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 11, 2020
Messages
721
Location
England
I can relate to wanting to accidentally die so I can get what I want without having to take responsibility.

I’m sorry you’re in that headspace again.
 
L

linus

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 27, 2019
Messages
1,368
Location
Eastern Europe
What if you ask your partner to hold you in their arms when you feel the urge?
 
S

so sad

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 24, 2016
Messages
167
she doesn't do affection and a lot of time I'm not with her when I want to do it. Also she is often the reason or at least part of the reason why I want to self harm in the first place.
I'm going to buy supplies at lunch - I feel more in control when I have the means to self harm
 
W

warnerc987

Member
Joined
Nov 8, 2019
Messages
15
Location
Frederick, MD
So after a few months of not self harming I'm back on it. I'm in a dreadful place and hurting myself gives me a break from it.
I have issues at home with a controlling partner, I hate myself and have no real support.

I want to die because I can't see a way through this but it would devastate my parents and I can't do that to them. I'm hoping to be in some sort of fatal accident so its not my fault.

xx
I understand. I had about 4 years clean, then 6 months and now I’ve had trouble stopping since about November.

I don’t have a partner but I have a lot of controlling people in my life and it’s like SH is the one thing I have control over.......
 
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