Avoidant personality disorder or social phobia?

A

Azelka

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 6, 2018
Messages
96
#1
Yeah I know you aren't professionals but I can't talk to mine, I'm stuck for some reason so I'm asking this question to you : I think I'm the center of anyone's attention when I go outside alone, like everyone is watching me and judging me or talking about me it is so intense that I try to think in their shoes, like I talk about myself in their shoes
 
albie

albie

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2013
Messages
166
#2
I have a friend like that. Must be very weird.
 
I

itsmeagain

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Joined
Dec 25, 2010
Messages
578
Location
england
#3
It's fairly common Azelka.
Feeling overly self conscious affects so many people.
Keep control by challenging your assumptions and thinking so what if they are looking at me?
Their problem.
 
daffy

daffy

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Founding Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2007
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3,461
Location
hiding behind the sofa
#4
I struggled and still do for years with this but a therapist said to me. ‘What do you think is so special about you that everyone has to talk about you’ When I thought about it I’m just an ordinary everyday person. Not good looking but not an ogre, I am clean and tidy. So why should anyone be talking about me. It doesn’t stop the thoughts but it helps you to put them into perspective and makes your thoughts easier to control

Daf
 
Soul_Deeps

Soul_Deeps

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Joined
Aug 31, 2017
Messages
151
Location
Germany
#5
I struggled and still do for years with this but a therapist said to me. ‘What do you think is so special about you that everyone has to talk about you’ When I thought about it I’m just an ordinary everyday person. Not good looking but not an ogre, I am clean and tidy. So why should anyone be talking about me. It doesn’t stop the thoughts but it helps you to put them into perspective and makes your thoughts easier to control

Daf
I've heard that too but I don't know about that. It's less about what makes you special but more about what makes you noticeable. Your looks, how you move, behave, what you do, everything, it feels like even though you try being undetected you get everyone's attention just because you are doing something very wrong, may it be stuff you are not sure about or stuff that you feel you have no control over.
 
V

vent101

Member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
15
Location
London
#6
I do this all the time. I'm always in someone else's thoughts thinking 'Do I look weird' 'do they know I care' 'can they tell I'm scarred' Truth is they probably aren't even focusing on you and if they were that would be an issue from their side, I mean who stares at a person and judges and talks about people... busy body's with no life !
I recommend positive affirmations? ... I need to try it myself hahaha
Perhaps looking in the mirror 'I am enough, I validate myself, I love myself'.

I know what it's like. You're not alone