• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Aspergers brothers in denial

F

fragrant_violet

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 29, 2021
Messages
487
Location
Tirana
Hello

Im sure this will resound with a few of you folk here. Any ideas would be really appreciated. Ive tried everything and given up

Have twin brothers of around 50. One quite successful, one never worked in his life due to extreme social anxiety. He is not even registered for benefits he is entitled to for fear of being offeted a job. Highly intellugent with furst class math degree. Other twin supports him financially. They live alone in family home, mother passed away recently.

When my lovely sister was still alive her doctor friend, just passing by on a visit, unofficially diagnosed them because she is an autism expert

Unfortunately, they dont realize they have this condition. Last time I tried talking to the unemployed one, he ran away.

They have no friends, not a one. Have eaten the same food for 25 years.

Not sure if they still go to church, I was thinking of getting a priest round but we live thousands of miles apart now.

Thanks for reading
 
F

fragrant_violet

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 29, 2021
Messages
487
Location
Tirana
Ok need to ask a different way

Is there any advantage in telling a 50 year old he got Aspergers and social anxiety and OCD? He dont consider it a problem

Best to just let him run?
 
F

fragrant_violet

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 29, 2021
Messages
487
Location
Tirana
Ok i give it ine last shot

Did any folk here get an Aspergers diagnosis at relatively late age say 35+?

If so did it do you any good ir do you wish you never heard?
 
M

Mistral

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 28, 2011
Messages
588
I very much doubt that the doctor friend of your sister actually gave an unofficial diagnosis when they saw your brothers. The doctor might have said some things that lead you or your sister to conclude that it was Aspergers, but they cannot give unofficial diagnoses by just calling in the manner you have described. I would try to get a proper diagnosis and take it from there.
 
M

Mistral

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 28, 2011
Messages
588
It is going difficult to get your brothers to agree to getting a proper diagnosis. I have heard of cases where say a girlfriend has persuaded the boyfriend she lives with to get a diagnosis. The situation with your two brothers is quite different. They live together and thus there is no pressing reason for them to find out about their mental health.

Do you or your sister have a pressing reason for getting a diagnosis? Maybe you are worried about their long-term prospects. I know aspergers can cause sufferers to behave in certain inappropriate ways. Have you seen any signs that they are a danger to themselves or the public?
 
F

fragrant_violet

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 29, 2021
Messages
487
Location
Tirana
Nope. No danger to anyone since they never leave the house.

Only the one who never worked is a worry. If something were to happen to his twin bro he would probably not be able to cope. Otherwise hes happy doing a crossword puzzle every day and listening to the same CD.

That sister sadly passed away before her time but I got 6 other siblings. None of us intend to pressure him to get help. Just seems like a waste of a life I guess
 
M

Mistral

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 28, 2011
Messages
588
I am sorry to hear about your sister. I am not a financial expert, but have you and your siblings thought of setting up a some sort of trust fund for the brother who does not work in case the worst happens?
 
F

fragrant_violet

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 29, 2021
Messages
487
Location
Tirana
I am sorry to hear about your sister. I am not a financial expert, but have you and your siblings thought of setting up a some sort of trust fund for the brother who does not work in case the worst happens?
One brother already did this for one sister with paranoid schizophrenia
I guess he could do it for that brother too. I'll suggest it. Thanks for the idea.
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
SilentButCaring82 I hate my Aspergers. So. Much. Social Anxiety Forum 4

Similar threads

Top