Asking Questions

shaky

shaky

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 2, 2009
Messages
7,587
Location
Warwickshire
#1
Autism - Asking Questions

I find it hard asking questions of people in conversations because
i) It seems impertinent. Asking questions is asking someone to reveal himself/herself and I worry that I am being too forward or that they will think I want to have sex with them.
ii) I am giving them control of the conversation. They will have the floor and I will have to wait for them to finish. I like to make a contribution to feel worthwhile. They might talk for ages on a topic I find tedious. They might start bragging about their achievements and make me feel small, inadequate or hard done by.
iii) I like to talk myself. I generally have hundreds of words and emotions and memories that I want to talk about and get off my chest (although, when I get an opportunity I can never remember a single one).
 
Poopy Doll

Poopy Doll

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Joined
Jun 13, 2015
Messages
11,437
Location
Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA
#2
It's hard to find a person where the conversation can just flow easily. There are listening skills I employ to get the conversation started.
 
Kerome

Kerome

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Sep 29, 2013
Messages
12,734
Location
Europe
#4
Often the best thing to do is ask “open questions”. These are questions which allow the person answering some scope in how long to talk and how much to tell.

“How was your day?” Is an open question, people can talk for ages about their day.
“How much did the shopping cost?” Is a closed question, people will just respond with a number.