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Apparently he's not so wonderful at all...

R

Raache

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Poland
This is the other thing that made me furious last night.
After that party I found that guy on facebook and texted him about how I'm sorry, embarassed, thankful, etc. He replied that it's nothing, everything's fine. I didn't even write back cause I thought he probably wouldn't want to talk to me anyway.
So last night (note that it's already been a couple of days after the party) he texted me totally out of the blue: "Let's make one thing clear: it was the last time you were hitting on me, ok? I care about my girlfriend and I don't want these kind of situations to happen ever again."
It came across a little agressive to me, but anyway, all this shame came back instantly, so I replied "of course, I'm so sorry, I lost control" etc.
And then...
He BLOCKED me.
He fucking blocked me on facebook.
Like, wtf?! Are we in a kindergarden? What did I say wrong? I wasn't even planning to write to him ever again! Is this really happening?
I feel this is just so unfair. My friends say that maybe his girlfriend found out and she made him write this and block me. But that would only prove that he's a dumbass, a silly child, who lets his yet teenage girlfriend tell him what to do.
Seriously, that's so frustrating, I don't deserve it at all. I only sent him two messages, ffs. Now I'm sure I'm gonna confront him about it on Thursday, and it's not going to be a nice conversation.
 
BlueBerry

BlueBerry

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He sounded like a nice guy on your other thread so maybe your right about his girlfriend pulling hard on his strings? You mentioned before that his relationship wasn't going well... maybe he's under a lot of stress to try and fix things with her.

Don't take it personally sweetie, he might be going through a lot of trouble right now with his GF. Maybe give him some time and he might be friendly again.

Or y'know, he might finish with his GF leaving more time for you! ;)

Don't put yourself down for this hon, you're lovely and sweet and we all get a little drunk now and again and say some stupid stuff. I remember I got drunk in 1st year (my first time) and I spent most of the night trying to cuddle up to 1 or 2 of my handsome male friends.

You haven't done anything wrong, I hope you can believe that sweetie :hug:

(BTW, his teenage GF isn't underage or anything? Coz thats a red light right there.)
 
R

Raache

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Oh, no, by teenage I mean 18. He's 20. And I'm 4 years older than her, which maybe isn't much, but it feels like a lifetime. Either I'm that mature already, or she's very childlish.
Thank you Blueberry for your kind words xxx
I know we all get really drunk sometimes and do some stupid things, but I feel I crossed every boundary there, lol. I even made a meme about it! I might post it in the Chill Out Lounge actually, let everyone have some laughs ; )
 
Jaminacaranda

Jaminacaranda

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I really don't think there's any need for you to beat yourself up about what you did too much because everybody who occasionally gets drunk ends up flirting with somebody that perhaps they shouldn't at some time or another - I know I have and I've seen plenty of my friends do the same thing too. On the other hand I think it would be best if you just forgot about this guy for the time being and left him alone. He might indeed be having problems in his current relationship but he obviously doesn't want you to contact him again. If you 'confront' him I fear that will only make things more difficult for both of you - you can still smile at him and say 'hello' in class but leave it at that - I think that would make you look cool and more mature.

In the grand scheme of things - is it really that terrible to be blocked by one person on facebook? If he has told his girlfriend about what happened she may indeed have told him not to have further contact with you - that's exactly what I would do! When I got together with my current partner a woman he had dated (from a dating site) a few times kept calling him up and she asked me if I minded if they stayed 'friends'. I told her I most definitely did mind, and I can't see what's wrong with that?
 
R

Raache

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Yeah, but I apologized and told him I won't do that again, I wasn't sending messages on and on and bothering him or his girlfriend in any way, so it just felt like an unfair slap in the face.
 
Monroe1980

Monroe1980

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Sounds like he told his girlfriend what happened and either she made him send that message and block you or..she could have done it herself on his account..Bet he'll be the one acting all sheepish the next time you meet.
 
Davey Blueeyes

Davey Blueeyes

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Everyone gets like this sometimes Raache, they really do. I couldn't tell you all the massively embarssing stuff I've done when i was drunk, it's all SOOO much worse than this! :redface:

Plus I think you are the most mature out of everyone here. She is probably putting him under a lot of pressure about this and showing her immaturity and he feels he is doing the right thing by being a pussy-whipped wimp. He may be doing the right thing but he certainly could handle it better. I would advise you let it slide and forget both of them, neither of them are worth your consideration by the sound of it?

You are bigger and better than both of them times 1000, leave them to get on with it. You are 4 years older than her and you mature so much between 18 and 22, you will see the world different to her.

You are the better person here, leave well alone and let them get on with it. Plus, and I cannot say this clearly enough, you have done NOTHING wrong here and what happened that night has happened to all of us sweetheart.
Davey x
 
Q

Quickduck

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He was a nice guy in that he helped you when you were drunk and didn't take advantage of you. The problem seems to be the flirting, which I suspect wasn't so much of a problem for him as it was for his girlfriend when he told her what happened.
As a guy if a woman flirts with you then your natural reaction is to be flattered whether you're in a relationship or not. Of course if you are with someone you can't flirt back, but still you would be flattered.
For his girlfriend however having another woman flirting with your boyfriend is a direct threat to your relationship and so it would be natural for her to put pressure on him, regardless of his feelings for you to break contact. His girlfriend won't want you being friends if she knows you're potentially interested in him as more than a friend. I strongly suspect she was behind him blocking you on Facebook; it seems likely anyway.
Perhaps she guilt tripped him, suggesting he was encouraging you and so to prove his loyalty to her and their relationship he had to break contact. You did nothing wrong in contacting him to apologise; just shows what a lovely lady you are. :hug:
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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...just a couple of things from outside where you are at.

can you be trusted when you are irrational?

can he be trusted when he is irrational?

this whole experience will blow over. ...but likely get worse if you aggravate it.

such are extremely difficult interactions with people that are possibly much worse at dealing with things than you are.

I let you run with the 'cool guy' thing despite thinking otherwise.

the answer to this emotional riddle.?

back right off and stay away.

the options to make a fool of yourself now?.. are too many!

you obviously feel insecure about being dis-respected.

but?...you put yourself in that position.

you are very intelligent and capable of rising above this situation.

alcoholic experiences can not be trusted as experiences that suit your unique trust in life.

...and in yourself... and the trust you have in others is a wonderful thing but can be temporary and I mean just hours and minutes if you let yourself go.

this guy might just return to you...and I hope he does.
but if he has a girl?...

you must allow for some time for him to re-direct his feelings permanently.

just please don't try and find out again by doing what you did before.

you are a very cool chick!...and from where I am from?

a woman like you could have any guy that she wants.
...any time of the day and all week.

we bipolars often take risks that we trust at the time and cannot help but take anyway... these risky behaviours are often the only way that we can identify the things that we care about.

most often?...

it's illness induced loneliness.... and where regular people just seem to 'ease' into this realisation?...

we tend to 'dis-ease' into the realisation that we are emotionally handicapped and terribly dis-advantaged.

I sure hope that you can manage the un-manageable... I believe that you can.

it's just a bit tricky ...yep

lv, dm
 
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R

Raache

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Poland
Well, I guess if you're all saying I should leave him alone, I will... Though I hate leaving things unexplained.. Tomorrow's gonna be so awkward :unsure:
I just can't shake this feeling it's completely not like him. I mean, I practically don't know him, but he was so kind and caring and understanding that night. I just hope he'll speak to me about it himself..
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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...love will always find a way.

being very 'gentle' with yourself will always help him to be 'gentle' with you.

... it seems that you are a little bit 'sick' with loveliness.

...and I sure hope that he does open up with you.

you have gone through enough to find out.

I pray all the good things that you get what you deserve
 
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