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Apparent competence

firemonkey

firemonkey

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 12, 2008
Messages
131
Location
Southend on sea
Personally speaking this makes a lot of sense.
competence.png

Taken from Borderline personality by John F Clarkin Elsa Marziali, Heather Munroe-Blum.


I can appear competent or even sometimes more than that in certain situations and yet in others it's like i'm floundering in an ocean of high and strong waves without a lifejacket.
An average or above average level of competence displayed in situation A is expected to be the case for situation B as though i am operating at a consistent level in all environments.


In situation A i may be coping well and my high intelligence will be to the fore. In situation B i may be really struggling and if stressful enough high emotionality will replace high intelligence replete with a heady brew of anxiety/paranoia/irrationality /defensiveness/reactiveness/fear etc. 51 and highly intelligent becomes an emotional 5-15 year old. The irrationality being displayed in a highly excitable scatter gun spewing forth of words.
 
A

Apotheosis

Guest
Makes a lot of sense to me too - I identify completely with it.
 
Q

quality factor

Guest
Personally speaking this makes a lot of sense.
competence.png

Taken from Borderline personality by John F Clarkin Elsa Marziali, Heather Munroe-Blum.


I can appear competent or even sometimes more than that in certain situations and yet in others it's like i'm floundering in an ocean of high and strong waves without a lifejacket.
An average or above average level of competence displayed in situation A is expected to be the case for situation B as though i am operating at a consistent level in all environments.


In situation A i may be coping well and my high intelligence will be to the fore. In situation B i may be really struggling and if stressful enough high emotionality will replace high intelligence replete with a heady brew of anxiety/paranoia/irrationality /defensiveness/reactiveness/fear etc. 51 and highly intelligent becomes an emotional 5-15 year old. The irrationality being displayed in a highly excitable scatter gun spewing forth of words.
I too identify with this comment ....I was seen as a very skilful teacher for twenty years until I broke down. Throughout the 20 years out of the classroom I was, and still am, an emotional wreck. Jeckyll and Hyde syndrome.:(
 
blackdog

blackdog

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
May 11, 2008
Messages
1,064
Location
Kent
I can identify with this article also. At work I wear my "mask" and seem to everyone to be in control and completely competent but outside work I can be in pieces.
 
Q

quality factor

Guest
Hi firemonkey, went on to read the whole article that your quote came from and found it extremely interesting. My year has been a total disaster with one crisis after another, yet I 'appear' to keep going, nobody knows the extent of the emotional rollercoaster I have been on. The book indicates that the life of a person with BPD is a continual lurch from one crisis to another...but I got the impression from the book that these 'crises' were often not so great in reality but an over-emotional response to each situation. I know in my heart that my responses have not been over emotional...how does one react to the death of a father that you love dearly?
I feel that if one is receiving treatment for BPD, then the therapist needs to know you extremely well to distinguish between an over emotional reaction and a natural one.
I asked my CPN the other day, how can the prognosis be favourable, if I have got to unlearn behaviour that has been in place for over 40 years.
Her answer was not very positive and has left me feeling depressed nearly all weekend, I have feelings of no hope at the moment.:(
 
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