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Anyone else feel that their life ended years ago?

tekkenfan94

tekkenfan94

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Feb 19, 2015
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My life 'ended' in 2012 when my depression got worse. I have not gotten better since then - only worse.

I feel like my best years were between 2005 - 2011. Those were the best years of my life. Everything was fine, I never worried about anything, and everything seemed fun.

Now, nothing interests me anymore. Meeting new people is boring and doesn't excite me anymore, I don't like it when I get too many messages on Facebook because I don't feel like talking to anyone anymore, and I couldn't care less if all my 'friends' stopped talking to me tomorrow. I'm also not interested in ANYONE that takes any liking to me or wants to start a relationship with me. I think it's because I am cynical and think everybody is only motivated by self-interest.

Anyone else like this? I wanna get better but I see no light at the end of the tunnel. I fear that I'll be like this for life and if that is the case then there's no point in me being here.
 

MarlieeB

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I'm totally the same.

Especially when it comes to messages. I find that I get annoyed after a while with someone messaging me. Lucky for me my one rl friend understands what I'm like.

But yeah, I feel my life is over as well.
 
maybe.shes.a.wildflower

maybe.shes.a.wildflower

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I felt like that yes but now is the time to start a new chapter and try work toward happiness again!
 
Sparklypurplepaws

Sparklypurplepaws

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I feel like that too, was just talking to someone about it earlier.
Ten years ago I was a completely different person to who I am now, I'm a shadow of my former self, I feel broken and un fixable.
 
S

stella

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Totally true, I just feel I've got stucked in 2012, as if time stopped, it's so annoying, each day seems the same but with slight changes, other times are big changes and that makes it even worse it's difficult to explain but yeah all seems pointless tbh

I hope you'll find the end of the tunnel ♥
 
SarahD

SarahD

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Me too. Since the end of 2011. Depression varies from very very depressed to severely depressed, except for two short periods when I had mixed episodes with hypomania predominant following dose titrations of antidepressants. I can't even look back and enjoy remembering the hypomania cos I did so many stupid things it stil makes me feel bad.

The worst thing is no hope. How do you climb out of the hole. And why bother? There is nothing outside to even want anymore.
 
Toasted Crumpet

Toasted Crumpet

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I think realistically my life ended after 6th form. That was a very long time ago btw. But I remember a quote I read I think at the beginning of Prozac Nation - "Very early on in my life it was already too late" - that just about sums it up.
 
Kerome

Kerome

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I remember going to the carnaval at age six dressed as a baker, it was all downhill from there and life stopped.

Then it started again and suddenly I was 39.
 
E

Elle-X

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Those thoughts run through my head everyday Tekkenfan94. Someone once told me I turned cynicism into a way of life which wasn't meant as a compliment...
 
M

messed-up

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Yep think mine pretty much changed in 2001 after that I've never been the same, maybe not badly depressed all the time, but definitely not the same person.
 
SarahD

SarahD

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I've already postd on this thread to say I feel life is finished, no hope etc for three years.

However I have suffered depression since I was 13, it ruined my teenage years, and I have had long severe episodes ever since. BUT in between I have had some good experiences and some happy times. Even after I thought everything was all over. So even though I feel for me there,is no more hope, I have to say don't give up hope. Good things can happen again. I hope they will for all of you.
 
T

Topcat

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I don't know if I'm the same, or different.
I feel my life is ruined and over, then it restarts with promise and excitement and plans, then its all over again and I lose it again, I find that quite devastating sometimes. Not to sound too dramatic, but to keep believing I've got it all back again and everything's going to be ok, going to go great, but then come back down and lose it, it's upsetting.
I forget so much though, I don't know how I used to be.
I remember being badly depressed recurrently since I was 18. But my life seems to have gone on. A lot of it is a bit of a mess though.
 
F

FallenAngel2

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Nov 8, 2014
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For me it's like I am just waiting to die.

I feel no matter how much I try and change my mindset, I always end up back in a pit of despair. It so frustrating for me like it is many others on here who don't want to go on feeling low, worthless and that nothing will ever work out the way they want it to.

1 day I know I will wake up and decide I can't go on just existing.
 
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