• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Anybody wanna be my friend?

D

Dooley

Guest
& though you haven't met us really...hopefully we can give you some hope that there are people in the world who are genuine and not everyone is out to use you :grouphug:


Thanks.
I having been living in council houses all my life and the people i was next to were not nice. No matter where i moved to, they were the wrong areas to move to.
Glad some people are nice. On here i mean.
Cheers
 
N

neggs

Active member
Joined
Feb 11, 2020
Messages
44
Location
Earth
dogs are great company!!!! absolutely love the furry companions!
dont you feel like talking to someone sometimes though?
side note: watch forest gump! great movie!
oh! you know what you could do? if you like kids, or animals, maybe see if you can volunteer somewhere. at least that way you could learn something new and maybe even be happy
 
D

Dooley

Guest
im really sorry to hear that. i understand your apprehension in social situations.
not sure how viable this is, but do you think you could move to a friendlier neighborhood and have a "fresh start" of sorts ?
maybe its just shitty people who did all those bad things. do you think you could give yourself a chance to get to know good people ?
Getting to know people is what i should do but unfortunely i just assume that everyone is two faced, only there to use you in time, and sooner or later you fall out with them and they become nasty. People thanks to past experience, are false. At least in this area nobody gives a damn about me, vice versa.
As for moving, the money we have i could use to move to a better area but that would mean that my wife snd son won't have money to fly over. Hopefully in 2 or 3 months they will be here but if they don't for some reason then i will move.
 
D

Dooley

Guest
dogs are great company!!!! absolutely love the furry companions!
dont you feel like talking to someone sometimes though?
side note: watch forest gump! great movie!
oh! you know what you could do? if you like kids, or animals, maybe see if you can volunteer somewhere. at least that way you could learn something new and maybe even be happy


Hi,
Even when my wife and son were here we kept ourselves to ourselves. We drove all day all over the country and we just didn't bother talking to anyone.
Even now i just don't care about talking to someone. I just tslk to my Son or wife on whatsspp via video chat.
Kids round here climb over the fence, try to destroy the fence and even kick on the front door and run. So thanks to the kids round here i do not like kids, apart from my own little one that is.
 
N

neggs

Active member
Joined
Feb 11, 2020
Messages
44
Location
Earth
Its a really positive sign that you're to looking forward to seeing your family and that you have some hope! maybe tell your wife what you're going through, and let her know that you'd like her to come back, and maybe settle your kid in one school that you both decide on.
Try not to be angry with the social system in place. The social worker was only doing his/her job in trying to make sure your kid has a good life. Unfortunately, lots of special needs children are abused by parents who just dont know how to handle the responsibility.
Infact, maybe you should focus your thoughts and energy into how to give your child a good life. See if you can find a special needs parents forum, or maybe seek help from social workers about how to approach your needs and your kids needs in a way thats healthy for everyone you love.
if youre still intouch with your wife and kid, it shows that you are capable of lasting relationships.
try to rekindle that fire within you!
 
D

Dooley

Guest
Hi, our child has been through a lot since he was 3. Leukemia. Spent the best part of his life then in hospital, blood transfusion, steroids, chemo plus other problems too. He had an operation to straighten his eyes, along with other problems he has.
We are still happily married. She has no intentions of going off with someone else nor do I. We keep in touch every day.
As for his school. At the moment in the US he is being home schooled. We are wanting him to be home schooled here too, we are looking into how much it will cost.
Before they left he went to a special needs school here, we drove 30 miles each way to take him and again to pick him up. In my banger. The school though he was not happy at which is why when they come back, we are going to home school him.
Hopefully in 3 years time my ban will get lifted and i can go back there and live with them.
 
D

Dooley

Guest
Its a really positive sign that you're to looking forward to seeing your family and that you have some hope! maybe tell your wife what you're going through, and let her know that you'd like her to come back, and maybe settle your kid in one school that you both decide on.
Try not to be angry with the social system in place. The social worker was only doing his/her job in trying to make sure your kid has a good life. Unfortunately, lots of special needs children are abused by parents who just dont know how to handle the responsibility.
Infact, maybe you should focus your thoughts and energy into how to give your child a good life. See if you can find a special needs parents forum, or maybe seek help from social workers about how to approach your needs and your kids needs in a way thats healthy for everyone you love.
if youre still intouch with your wife and kid, it shows that you are capable of lasting relationships.
try to rekindle that fire within you!
Hi, our child has been through a lot since he was 3. Leukemia. Spent the best part of his life then in hospital, blood transfusion, steroids, chemo plus other problems too. He had an operation to straighten his eyes, along with other problems he has.
We are still happily married. She has no intentions of going off with someone else nor do I. We keep in touch every day.
As for his school. At the moment in the US he is being home schooled. We are wanting him to be home schooled here too, we are looking into how much it will cost.
Before they left he went to a special needs school here, we drove 30 miles each way to take him and again to pick him up. In my banger. The school though he was not happy at which is why when they come back, we are going to home school him.
Hopefully in 3 years time my ban will get lifted and i can go back there and live with them.
 
N

neggs

Active member
Joined
Feb 11, 2020
Messages
44
Location
Earth
dooley, your life is pretty much in your control and you have a gameplan! Thats waaaay more than most can say for themselves.
youre so so lucky to have a healthy, loving marriage, with so much faith in eachother, in this day and age, touchwood!
i hope you focus on these blessings in order to help pull yourself out of your depression and social anxiety.
Sorry to hear about your childs illness. Leukemia is one of the rougher diseases.
have you tried speaking to a therapist?
 
D

Dooley

Guest
dooley, your life is pretty much in your control and you have a gameplan! Thats waaaay more than most can say for themselves.
youre so so lucky to have a healthy, loving marriage, with so much faith in eachother, in this day and age, touchwood!
i hope you focus on these blessings in order to help pull yourself out of your depression and social anxiety.
Sorry to hear about your childs illness. Leukemia is one of the rougher diseases.
have you tried speaking to a therapist?
Hi,
Last year i saw a psyciatrist. Because of my depression and suicidal thoughts along with the social anxiety. I told him that he, like every other doctor and psyciatrist in the past that i was referred to, don't really care about me and don't really take on board what i am telling them or written down for them. I think we are just a number and another hours money in his pocket. But, yeah, i saw a psyciatrist and he told me he did care about me and gave me meds for my depression and social anxiety. He then said 7 months later that he was retiring and that he wasnt going to refer me to anyone else and instead i had to go to talking therapy, to go out and meet people and talk about my social anxiety. Social anxiety, to go out to talking therapy amonst other people. So i told him that i was right all along.
Therapy to me is useless. People pretending to listen, care about you , in one ear out the other. Just a number, a pay cheque. Nobody is interested. So thats why i am not interested in them.
Just talk to my animals, my wife and son until we are together.
 
FlowerBox

FlowerBox

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 7, 2020
Messages
679
Location
Here
I feel for you there...my first therapist & psychiatrist were absolutely horrible for me. I thought therapy was useless for me too but it really does make a world of a difference to find one who actually helps you see how to help yourself, instead of just telling you what you "should do" and not actually listening really
But I am glad you have the animals and have your wife and son to talk to still, though I know it's not quite the same with it not being in-person :(
 
D

Dooley

Guest
I feel for you there...my first therapist & psychiatrist were absolutely horrible for me. I thought therapy was useless for me too but it really does make a world of a difference to find one who actually helps you see how to help yourself, instead of just telling you what you "should do" and not actually listening really
But I am glad you have the animals and have your wife and son to talk to still, though I know it's not quite the same with it not being in-person :(


It is nowhere near the same as being together. But thanks to smartphones and video call i can go out in the car with them to Walmart and White Castle for burgers and chat whilst they are scoffing themselves on them with their milkshakes or frozen yogurt.
I have my meds, that helps relax me and sleep at night.
Chatting to strangers about how i feel etc.....
no. Been there, waste of time.😊
 
A

aisha23

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 29, 2019
Messages
1,327
Location
UK
I also hope you have a good day.

I am a lot younger than you (23), but am around for chat if you need
 
D

Dooley

Guest
I also hope you have a good day.

I am a lot younger than you (23), but am around for chat if you need

Hi,
Thanks . It is nice to chat to someone who is more or less the same boat as me. Age doesn't come into it. We all have our problems.
How are you?
 
N

neggs

Active member
Joined
Feb 11, 2020
Messages
44
Location
Earth
ugh. i know how you feel. ive never been to therapy, but i know from a medical point of view how it is. i wanted to psychiatry but i was always scared that ill get too involved in peoples lives and it would therefore affect my own. i know how therapists are trained to care to a certain point and have to switch it off when they go home so they can keep their own lives intact and not mess up mine further. it really is a complex relationship.
i find therapy in people around me. i think the best therapy is with your wife. but try not to burden her with too much at a time because you may effect her lifestyle and moods too.
maybe once your wife is in town, you can go out together and do something a little social. if something goes wrong, youll always know that shes got your back
 
D

Dooley

Guest
ugh. i know how you feel. ive never been to therapy, but i know from a medical point of view how it is. i wanted to psychiatry but i was always scared that ill get too involved in peoples lives and it would therefore affect my own. i know how therapists are trained to care to a certain point and have to switch it off when they go home so they can keep their own lives intact and not mess up mine further. it really is a complex relationship.
i find therapy in people around me. i think the best therapy is with your wife. but try not to burden her with too much at a time because you may effect her lifestyle and moods too.
maybe once your wife is in town, you can go out together and do something a little social. if something goes wrong, youll always know that shes got your back
Hi,
You are right. The best therapy i have is with my wife. She also cares a lot about me, understands me inside and out and wants me to be happy. She is doing her best to sort things out so that we can be together. She wants to help me with everything, makes 3 way calls to people i have to talk to. If i need things she orders them for me. Anything. She told me that our Son wants to come back to the UK, mainly because there are less bugs flying around and the cooler weather in the summer. She is the best thing that happened to me.
When she is here she loves to drive the car all over the country. She hates it here, in this area, it is boring she said. But, we will move somewhere better.
 
Top