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Any tips for someone who has stopped functioning in public.

  • Thread starter Scruffy_Bubbles
  • Start date
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Scruffy_Bubbles

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Oct 2, 2019
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Hi everyone this is my first post here not in introductions. I have severe problems with anger, "caused" by other people and it seems to just be getting worse. I can't do the things I used to enjoy or even hold down a job now because I can't cope with being in public now. It started off being defensive anger, like fight or flight I guess, but now as I try to better myself with DBT, traditional therapy, ect. I'ts turned into anxiety of my symptoms, and anger about the way the I feel. For example I used to go to the grocery store, get mad at something stupid that someone probably didn't intend, and physically hurt myself or inanimate objects so that I don't hurt anyone else. Now I would say in general I'm doing better controlling myself and rationalizing situations. But now I get angry at myself for the way I feel. "A normal person wouldn't get upset by this." Now it has gotten so bad that I'm scared of going out in public, i'm scared of losing control and really hurting myself.

Sorry if this is confusing I guess i'm just looking for other people similar experiences or things that have helped you guys.

Thanks
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

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Hi there. I'm assuming you've been diagnosed with PTSD since you're posting in this section?

I have it and I can relate to what you're saying. I also get mad at myself for my reactions to things. Sometimes I feel humiliated too because some things I know I blow out of proportion where other people wouldn't be the least bothered by the same things.

I try to not beat myself up over it though.Its hard not to at times.

What have you done to help yourself control the anger? That's something I've really been working on. I know some people hit pillows and things like that to get it out.

I'm working on expressing what I really feel instead of allowing it to turn into anger. I've realized my anger is a result of feeling afraid. When I feel vulnerable and scared I lash out often and easily and it makes me feel better in the moment,it takes away the fear.But then I have to suffer the consequences of my actions,which is usually apologizing for yelling and cussing at someone.Im trying to find ways to deal with and express fear and I'm not quite sure what works best yet.

I wish I had advice on how to not get mad at yourself for having PTSD reactions.Maybe remembering that it's called a "disorder" for a reason might help you go a little easier on yourself?
 
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Scruffy_Bubbles

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Oct 2, 2019
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Thanks for your response. I should have clarified that I do deal with ptsd so my bad.

Yeah I relate to a lot of what you are saying. and honestly it sounds like you are just farther along the same road I'm on. I've been doing traditional therapy on and off for over 10 years now and recently i've been going to a dbt class and I think that's what has helped the most. The last few months I really think I've been doing better but it's the, " I have to deal with this at all. " wave after rationalizing what's already happened. I think the coping skills I've learned are super great but it feels more like a disability more then it ever has.

I guess what I am trying to say is that even though it felt like hell before it just now seems like a problem. For the first time it feels like I'm being handicapped (or realizing I have a handicap) by something that isn't my fault, and that itself is super frustrating.
 
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Agag

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Oct 3, 2019
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It doesn’t sound like an easy situation. My thing has been paranoid schizophrenia but I’ve had dealings with being emotionally overwhelmed and having to build up trust in myself.

I offer that it is helpful to journal experiences so you can look back on your progress. Then you can start building up a defence. So it’s like, “look at when I got through this or that.” It’s hopefully evidence building. I find that when in an anxious situation, it is difficult but when coming down, talk confidence into yourself and correct what I call error thinking by analysing and reflecting but also encouraging yourself. And don’t worry about if it makes sense or feels helpful but that it’s getting in there on the sub/unconscious, and will lead to, hopefully, progress.
 
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Scruffy_Bubbles

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I think writing in a journal is a good idea thanks for the suggestion
 
daffy

daffy

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It’s good that your getting therapy and dbt. But its a long course and can take two years to complete. My daughter has cptsd bpd and the dbt has changed her life. It’s not that she’s cured but more that she knows how to cope with the situations and her anger isn’t much of a problem now. I do hope that it works for you but you have to stick with it. She’s even thinking about restarting work again.
Also i do think that writing a journal is good as you will in a few months be able to see have far you have come. We do have a journals section in the forum and you can write anything that you want. It doesnt have to be about your MH you could write about family friends what your doing etc. Take a look thru at what some of the others have written
 
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Mujihina

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Oct 8, 2019
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I deal with PTSD and what your saying resonates with me, one thing one of my therapists recommend to try was meditation, anger management techniques, breathing, if your the artist type having a time in the day where you draw out frustrations might help. I only suggest it because it's what ive tried, it may not work for everyone, one thing that i noticed really made a big improvement for my life was my bird before he passed away, or a emotional support animal.
When i had my bird it was a strong reminder that anger can damage those i love, birds are fragile creatures, but they can be very cuddly.
I hope something helps
 
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