• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

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Any help or encouragement welcome

S

Starbright

Guest
Hi

My friend has schizophrenia and is ill again right now. She tried not to tell me but something slipped out. She said she has to cope totally alone because that is how she will have to cope when she goes back to work. I tried to tell her that she has to tell her team and talk to them but she thinks that this is not coping. When she is ill she cuts her arms deeply and takes too much PRN medication. Last time was October and I had to call an ambulance to get her to A and E. The crisis team are total rubbish and never admit anyone no matter how much of a danger to themselves they are. She has no family who care and no carer and no partner. Her other friend who helps her also has serious mental illness and at the moment is having some time to himself so he has turned off all his phones. He does this periodically. So basically it is just me trying to stop her killing herself accidentally. This is a sh*t sh*t sh*t situation. I have my own problems but I am not prepared to leave her to her own devices and I hope she would do the same for me when I'm ill because I always try to commit suicide when I am. She is still talking and taking care of her pets this evening (as of 11.30) so I think she is still ok and I am going to ring tomorrow morning to see how she is then. If she is ill I will have to go round and stay with her until she gets well and try and get the crisis team out. The thing is I have things to do tomorrow and everytime this happens I end up spending three or four days with her and dropping all my commitments. I won't be able to do this when I am working or even in September when i start my course. She has no-one else. This is a totally ****** up situation. I'm not prepared to leave her but it's totally cr*p that it falls to me and me alone. Where are the professionals? Sitting at home in their nice cozy houses drinking wine and forgetting all those who rely on them. This is total sh*t. Nobody gives a sh*t. She or I could kill ourselves and nobody would ever know or care or stop us or put us in hospital. S*d it, I'm going to the local news about our crisis team. Ought to be called the b*gger all team.That's what they do, b*gger all. F***:(:(:(:cry::cry::cry::(:(:cry::cry::(:(:cry::cry::(:(:cry::cry:
 
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honeyquince

honeyquince

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Hi Starbright,

I'm glad to see that your post asks for help or encouragement as I feel its really only encouragement that I can offer! I was however upset to hear of you and your friends situation and can empathise with her belief that coping has to be on her own. I have been (am?) in a similar situation where I find it very difficult to ask for help. However, over the last year when I've got to a crisis point and finally admitted that I needed help I've always been lucky enough to be treated well and admitted to hosp. where I was at least safe.

All I can say is to keep your friend and her team involved in a discussion so that at the very least everyone knows what's going on. Does she have regular visits from her team that you could maybe sit in on next time? With your friends consent could you ask for a meeting now?

If you think things are getting really bad you could take her to A&E before things get really life threatening - you should then at least be seen by the on-call psychiatrist who should do an assessment. Obviously this is with your friends consent - I'm not sure how you would work with your friend to get her to see that hospital may be the best way forward. I guess sometimes just being the fab friend that you obviously are is as much as we can give - but it's important to keep giving if you can.

Don't forget that everyone here is a sort of friend to you so do keep posting and I'm sure someone will come up with a better response than me! In the meantime here are some hugs... :hug::hug::hug:
 
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Starbright

Guest
Dear Honeyquince and everyone else,

Thanks and sorry. I was in a really bad space last night. It is true that our crisis team is total rubbish and leave people who are a danger to themselves on their own at home for 23 hours out of every 24, but it seems that my friend is not in that position right now. I rang her today and she seems ok, a bit subdued but still able to talk etc. She says she just wants to be left alone and says she doesn't want to call her team. I made her promise to call them and then without telling her I've just called them myself and told them not to tell her that I called but to alert them that she is not too well right now. It really doesn't help that she is so unco-operative. At least when I'm ill I'll do what you tell me. I don't know how to sit down with her when she's better and tell her that she's being irresponsible and causing me a big problem but I'm going to have to do it. Last night I was angry and frightened and worried. Now I feel that things are not as bad as they have been in the past at least so I hope her team will get involved now. I am serious about going to the local news about the crisis team. Thanks for your concern, honeyquince. I might need you all to vent to if this all goes t*ts up but let's cross our fingers that it won't.
 
honeyquince

honeyquince

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You've got my fingers crossed! :)
 
R

ramboghettouk

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Know the feeling, the women upstairs came off her injection last year and they just left her, she ended up so miserable she had to go back on it, in the process she alienated a lot of people, i don't like to admit it but i care, she's been nicer to me than most if not all women, i wory about my feelings in case i get hurt
 
S

Starbright

Guest
All is ok. She hasn't hit complete rock bottom. She is largely uncommunicative but if pushed will still answer in a relevant way. She is keeping her flat clean and looking after her animals. The crisis team are going in every day. I am not worried any more. I will keep in touch by phone. I visited today but she didn't really want me there so I will just phone and only go round if she gets worse. Thanks to all who supported me. I really needed it. Thanks.
 
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