• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Anxious About Taking Risks and Leaving Comfort Zone

K

KeyTrio

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 11, 2020
Messages
53
Location
England
Hi, this is my first post on here. I have been diagnosed with moderate to severe anxiety and depression and I am currently on 100MG sertraline a day. I don’t know where else to really ask for advice so here goes.

I have basically been in talks with someone online through a dating app, then WhatsApp. We have decided to try out a friends with benefits situation.

However, instead of thinking “this will be a fun new experience”, I’m straight away going to the worst possible situation - “what if I get feelings? What if I want to enter a relationship and she doesn’t? What if this just ends badly?”. I catastrophize a LOT and I know I can be irrational, but the fear and panic always tends to win and I’ll put off going out of my comfort zone or taking any risks in life.

I’ve never had an experience like this, so I’m worried things will go wrong. I don’t want a relationship and we both agreed it’ll be no strings attached fun, yet I STILL worry I’ll get feelings and want to pursue a relationship. It’s so hard to explain...

I have a history of not taking risks, not leaving my comfort zone, and not “living” or “experiencing” life.

What can I do to get over this and just go with the flow, regardless of a good or bad outcome?

Any advice and help would be massively appreciated.
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
10,754
Location
Nowhere
n yeah .... !
I get that, Im a happy carefree person
and then suddenly I'm attracted to someone
a little bit of communcation with them
and ptah ! the thing gets a grip on me
and I cant be myself any more !

and I keep wanting to find out what they are doing
that kind of thing

stepping out of comfort zone ?
I will see if I can do it

thanks that was interesting !
 
K

KeyTrio

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 11, 2020
Messages
53
Location
England
Can I add I’m also worried that if she gets feelings for me and I have to step back and say “this isn’t what we agreed on”. I hate to be the person who hurts someone. I’m going straight to a negative conclusion again, I know. It is a genuine concern though for me.
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
10,754
Location
Nowhere
yes that as well !
I wonder if these feelings show
that its not going very well
like maybe there needs to be a platonic
side to the relationship
that holds it together

like its not all about attraction ?
I dont know
 
K

KeyTrio

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 11, 2020
Messages
53
Location
England
Thanks for the reply Zoe1, and I do appreciate it, however could someone else give me some advice and help please?

Thank you.
 
Top