Anxiety

[F242]

This has been so far the hardest year of my life. I started struggling with severe anxiety. I stopped going out and corona virus seemed the perfect excuse to stay home in my safe zone. I want to mention that I started suffering from anxiety attacks last winter, I had no clue about it and was really shocked that I could actually experience such feelings. Ive always been a really social and active person, I used to go out literally everyday and meeting up with people was the easiest thing for me. I started suffering from bad anxiety attacks after I experienced a really bad one in public around February. I simply thought I had a panic attack, maybe caused by university stress. I also met a psychologist, who obviously told me I had anxiety.
Anyway, quarantine got all of us stuck at home, and my anxious side was somehow glad about it.
With time passing by and the virus getting better luckily, it was time for me to leave my house and do something about it. I'm aware of the fact that hiding and avoiding meetings and people doesn't get it any better. During the past months I tried hard to go out but everytime I experience anxiety and came back home feeling miserable and frustrated. I feel sorry for people who are around me who obviously see me struggling and have to worry about me. I wish I could go out feeling happy and focus on what the person in front of me says without sweating or think I will possibly pass out in the next 5 minutes.
I also have to mention that there was positive events where I didn't struggle at all, but eventually anxiety kicked in again.
Yesterday and even some days before, I was asked to go out and, as much as I wanted to avoid it, I got myself together and got ready. Once I got to the place I started getting paranoid and was craving for cold water to calm me down (that's what sometimes makes me better in such situations). Obviously, didn't help this time. I was with my parents and it was their wedding anniversary. While eating I started feeling weak, lightheaded and I couldn't breathe properly even though we were sitting outside in an open space. I left the place and went out to calm down and eventually my mom followed me. We had a talk and I'm glad my parents are aware of this situation. I got "better" and came back to my family and the rest of the night went by.
I'm trying not to be negative and appreciate the fact that this was a short anxiety attack, however I am devastated and truly sorry to made my family worry in such occasion.
I don't want people to look at me and keep asking me if I feel sick, I just want to spend time with friends and family like a normal and calm person would. This situation is really damaging my relationships and my confidence.. I hope some of you can understand what I mean, I would write even more but I'm aware that this post is already too long lol
If some of you can relate, please reach out to me. Thank you.

 

[Shay94]

I can sort relate to that going out in public crowded places, especially if a fuss is being made over me. Like I used to get severe anxiety attacks over people singing happy birthday to me, trying hard to please me n make it a special day, I'd feel nauseous, claustrophobic & have to leave the room for a bit. Eventually I'll be able to head back in with them but it'd still always be there... I've always had anxiety growing up, its gotten worse since covid 19 & my mother being in hospital lots.

 

[F242]

I can sort relate to that going out in public crowded places, especially if a fuss is being made over me. Like I used to get severe anxiety attacks over people singing happy birthday to me, trying hard to please me n make it a special day, I'd feel nauseous, claustrophobic & have to leave the room for a bit. Eventually I'll be able to head back in with them but it'd still always be there... I've always had anxiety growing up, its gotten worse since covid 19 & my mother being in hospital lots.

I relate to what you said a lot. I sometimes had trouble eating in public because I was terrified or choking in front of people, because I felt so weak I couldn't control my body and movements anymore. I think my biggest fear related to anxiety is to pass out. Really sucks,I feel you.

 

[Shay94]

I relate to what you said a lot. I sometimes had trouble eating in public because I was terrified or choking in front of people, because I felt so weak I couldn't control my body and movements anymore. I think my biggest fear related to anxiety is to pass out. Really sucks,I feel you.

It does suck lots, I think that's also why my anxiety increases if I go out to a work dinner or something. I don't want to be rude and not order food but I'm scared of the anxiety creeping up n making it so bad for me that I can't eat etc so I try making myself think of other things. As for my birthday, I still feel the same anxiety etc but don't really go out much to do anything for it any more so it isn't as severe as it used to be

 

[F242]

I feel you @Shay94 . Sometimes even focusing on other things becomes so hard because I feel so overwhelmed..
Please feel free to reach out to me whenever you want to talk

 

[Shay94]

I feel you @Shay94 . Sometimes even focusing on other things becomes so hard because I feel so overwhelmed..
Please feel free to reach out to me whenever you want to talk

That's true, it sucks feeling that way. If I go to places im comfortable at then anxiety is only there slightly but if its something completely new or seeing someone I haven't seen on years, then my stomach twists & I can't eat coz I'm that freaked out n overwhelmed

 

[F242]

Exactly. My brain is so triggered because of the trauma I had when I first experienced an anxiety attack. I was sitting in a bar, so everytime I find myself in a bar, restaurant or any other place where I have to sit down, I most of the time have anxious thoughts and eventually feel sick. I don't know if it's just me but I'm sure you can relate to this.
However anxiety succeeds to show up at any situation.

 

[RedYeti]

This has been so far the hardest year of my life. I started struggling with severe anxiety. I stopped going out and corona virus seemed the perfect excuse to stay home in my safe zone. I want to mention that I started suffering from anxiety attacks last winter, I had no clue about it and was really shocked that I could actually experience such feelings. Ive always been a really social and active person, I used to go out literally everyday and meeting up with people was the easiest thing for me. I started suffering from bad anxiety attacks after I experienced a really bad one in public around February. I simply thought I had a panic attack, maybe caused by university stress. I also met a psychologist, who obviously told me I had anxiety.
Anyway, quarantine got all of us stuck at home, and my anxious side was somehow glad about it.
With time passing by and the virus getting better luckily, it was time for me to leave my house and do something about it. I'm aware of the fact that hiding and avoiding meetings and people doesn't get it any better. During the past months I tried hard to go out but everytime I experience anxiety and came back home feeling miserable and frustrated. I feel sorry for people who are around me who obviously see me struggling and have to worry about me. I wish I could go out feeling happy and focus on what the person in front of me says without sweating or think I will possibly pass out in the next 5 minutes.
I also have to mention that there was positive events where I didn't struggle at all, but eventually anxiety kicked in again.
Yesterday and even some days before, I was asked to go out and, as much as I wanted to avoid it, I got myself together and got ready. Once I got to the place I started getting paranoid and was craving for cold water to calm me down (that's what sometimes makes me better in such situations). Obviously, didn't help this time. I was with my parents and it was their wedding anniversary. While eating I started feeling weak, lightheaded and I couldn't breathe properly even though we were sitting outside in an open space. I left the place and went out to calm down and eventually my mom followed me. We had a talk and I'm glad my parents are aware of this situation. I got "better" and came back to my family and the rest of the night went by.
I'm trying not to be negative and appreciate the fact that this was a short anxiety attack, however I am devastated and truly sorry to made my family worry in such occasion.
I don't want people to look at me and keep asking me if I feel sick, I just want to spend time with friends and family like a normal and calm person would. This situation is really damaging my relationships and my confidence.. I hope some of you can understand what I mean, I would write even more but I'm aware that this post is already too long lol
If some of you can relate, please reach out to me. Thank you.

Sounds rough sorry about that.
You’re not alone on this, yesterday I was helping my mum to the hairdressers as she’s got a broken ankle. Anxiety was flaring up, I had to get the taxi to stop and get out to throw up.
Its good you’ve noticed the change, you’re aware of your own self. Anxiety’s a bitch, hope you start to get a handle on things

 

[F242]

Sounds rough sorry about that.
You’re not alone on this, yesterday I was helping my mum to the hairdressers as she’s got a broken ankle. Anxiety was flaring up, I had to get the taxi to stop and get out to throw up.
Its good you’ve noticed the change, you’re aware of your own self. Anxiety’s a bitch, hope you start to get a handle on things

really sorry about that. How are you feeling these days?

 

[RedYeti]

really sorry about that. How are you feeling these days?

Yeah alright, one day at a time. Trying to be more honest about it.
how have you been keeping recently??