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Anthropophobia=Fear of People?!

Q

quilteddown10

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Apr 26, 2021
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I've always had a fear of people since childhood more then a fear of other kids - mainly cos I know what people are capable of. Bullying made my early life hell.

I moved somewhere more remote as soon as I got the opportunity, alot more elderly people (I feel less threatend by them mostly) I have physical disabilities myself so know I wouldn't be able to defend myself now. Haven't been out socially since before the first lockdown and the amount of violence thats out there right now is not helping me want to return to going out in public spaces! ..and I hate gossip too!..and old folk are still guilty of this talking amongst themselves and some on SM discussing you there.

Used to do social media but now find that quite anxiety producing as the current trend seems to be just mindlessly attacking other people's posts. It's hard to know what you're allowed to say or do these day that won't be seen as 'bad' by the woke/snowflake brigade. It's easier to say and do nothing and keep to myself.
Hi Twinkle Toes

I can relate to what you are saying here.

I have a fear of others, particularly being seen by others.

If I could spend the rest of my life speaking from behind a mask, I would. Ironically, I would be much more myself (because less anxious).
 
Twinkle Toes

Twinkle Toes

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I think in me it was because kids used to mock everything I did, the way I walked, talked, what I wore, what music I liked etc it made me hyper-aware of everything and daren't do anything in front of others incase 'it wasn't normal or popular'

I have alters and after this a 'deaf alter' came out who did not speak or respond to anyone who didn't communicate with them either in sign language or write it down, if they couldn't communicate with us, there was no point in them making fun of us behind our back cos we couldn't hear or understand them!
 
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Desp47

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May 20, 2021
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Bury st Edmund's
Do you have DID too? Gosh that must be a struggle? I hope you have help and support?
I understand completely about the mocking thing. I was bullied at school too. That's what caused my social phobia. It was long yerm, consistent, physical/sexual/mental abuse that caused my anthropophobia though.
I have no experience of DID. I have a bipolar disorder too, and get what it feels like to be a different person. My manic phases are bad stuff. Especially now I can't get my meds! Xx
 
Twinkle Toes

Twinkle Toes

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Do you have DID too? Gosh that must be a struggle? I hope you have help and support?
I understand completely about the mocking thing. I was bullied at school too. That's what caused my social phobia. It was long yerm, consistent, physical/sexual/mental abuse that caused my anthropophobia though.
I have no experience of DID. I have a bipolar disorder too, and get what it feels like to be a different person. My manic phases are bad stuff. Especially now I can't get my meds! Xx

Actually it's kind of been an advantage with having Autism too. As I've never known any different and when I was a child (70's/early 80's) they didn't even understand autism let alone DID! Parents just thought I had imaginary friends and when I got to my teens I was told it was no longer appropriate to be 'talking to my imaginary friends'..so I learned to keep them secret!

Others would come out in public where no-one knew us, so I would have a completely different personality away at college and university. I could be the deaf-mute student at one end of a train journey and 'the original self' by the time my dad was picking me up from the train station at the other end! Sometimes I even had seperate memories of the same event if 2 different alters came out within that time frame. Back then I didn't understand about DID so didn't have direct communication with the 'other selves', just an awareness that I 'became someone else' sometimes in situations.

I was in my 40's before I realised this was not a normal part of Autism!
 
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Desp47

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Messages
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Bury st Edmund's
That is an amazing positive way to see things! Does original self mean that you have a sort of main you? Sorry if I'm prying, it's just very interesting (if you don't have to live it I guess) and I don't know much about it. Please just ignore if you like. I'm not easily offended. I think when you live with big issues, you don't sweat the small ones!
I have dyscalculia, an autistic spectrum disorder.
Again, most likely dumb questions, but do you have a certain amount of personas? Do you like some better than others?
Sorry again. I always feel I would rather people ask than assume, but that isn't everyone's way.
 
D

Desp47

Active member
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May 20, 2021
Messages
36
Location
Bury st Edmund's
Actually it's kind of been an advantage with having Autism too. As I've never known any different and when I was a child (70's/early 80's) they didn't even understand autism let alone DID! Parents just thought I had imaginary friends and when I got to my teens I was told it was no longer appropriate to be 'talking to my imaginary friends'..so I learned to keep them secret!

Others would come out in public where no-one knew us, so I would have a completely different personality away at college and university. I could be the deaf-mute student at one end of a train journey and 'the original self' by the time my dad was picking me up from the train station at the other end! Sometimes I even had seperate memories of the same event if 2 different alters came out within that time frame. Back then I didn't understand about DID so didn't have direct communication with the 'other selves', just an awareness that I 'became someone else' sometimes in situations.

I was in my 40's before I realised this was not a normal part of Autism!
I guess you have been coping with your difficulties your whole life too then? Tough slog isn't it?
 
Twinkle Toes

Twinkle Toes

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I guess you have been coping with your difficulties your whole life too then? Tough slog isn't it?
well I didn't have the physical disability in childhood. That came mid 30's so I was previously fully mobile tbh I found that harder I think cos of the amount of physical contact needed during the medical tests. hospital and needing an helper to start with.

I don't want to take over the thread but I have a journal in the journal section that explains 'my system' fully if you'd like to take a look.

 
D

Desp47

Active member
Joined
May 20, 2021
Messages
36
Location
Bury st Edmund's
well I didn't have the physical disability in childhood. That came mid 30's so I was previously fully mobile tbh I found that harder I think cos of the amount of physical contact needed during the medical tests. hospital and needing an helper to start with.

I don't want to take over the thread but I have a journal in the journal section that explains 'my system' fully if you'd like to take a look.

I would love to see it. It's always good to see other peoples coping mechanisms. As long as you don't mind.
 
D

Desp47

Active member
Joined
May 20, 2021
Messages
36
Location
Bury st Edmund's
Hi Twinkle Toes

I can relate to what you are saying here.

I have a fear of others, particularly being seen by others.

If I could spend the rest of my life speaking from behind a mask, I would. Ironically, I would be much more myself (because less anxious).
Hi there, I don't know if you have support for this, but you can teach yourself to wear an invisible mask, I don't know if you are a makeup wearer, but I've found makeup can be a good mask. I also have costumes, not like clown, but I have a horse, so equestrian is a good one. Baseball cap and a face mask and all you see is a horse person, not me. I was a vet nursing assistant when I was able to work, and still have my scrubs and fob watch and stethoscope! That's the outfit I break out when I'm super nervous. I hold my car keys in my habd, so I remind myself I can escape. Wearing sunglasses! I've become a master at becoming invisable! Don't know if any of that will help at all?
 
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