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Am I depressed?

C

Casper_1

New member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
3
Location
Uk
I am a recovering alcoholic and heroin addict. Been clean and sober for over 4 years through the help of rehabs and AA. I had to rebuild my life from nothing, and have done very well for myself (externally). I managed to live a spiritual life.
I have been through many hard times before. But never have I felt as bad as I do at the moment. I’m not sure if I have or have ever had depression. I feel so low, lonely, run down and sad. Felt this way for months now. I can’t function properly, can’t eat, sleep or smile. I can’t focus at work and making loads of mistakes no matter how hard I try. I feel like I’m messing everything up and hate myself. Heart racing all the time. Is this depression? Don’t know what to do anymore
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
2,097
Location
Canada
Sounds like you are depressed. Any help available? Well done on the sobriety and welcome to the forum.
 
C

Casper_1

New member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
3
Location
Uk
Thank you for taking the time to reply. I have help with AA. Although it’s been difficult attending during lockdown. I have a sponsor, who I have told how I feel. She has told me that it’s me that’s putting myself through this. My attitude at looking at things negativity and self pity. I agree that somethings that can be true. But on this occasion I feel so bad and would do anything to feel better
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2011
Messages
36,750
Location
Magical fairy wonderland xxxx
please don't hate yourself ,i bet your a lovely person x welcome to the forum x we are happy to have you here
Lu x
 
M

Mistral

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 28, 2011
Messages
432
Well done for getting free from those addictions. Depression can creep up on you even when you think things are going fairly well for you. It may seem like a challenge you just do not need after all you have done to improve your life. I would use all the resources that you can find. You certainly need help in my view. Do you have any AA literature that could help you?
 
C

Casper_1

New member
Joined
Oct 22, 2020
Messages
3
Location
Uk
Well done for getting free from those addictions. Depression can creep up on you even when you think things are going fairly well for you. It may seem like a challenge you just do not need after all you have done to improve your life. I would use all the resources that you can find. You certainly need help in my view. Do you have any AA literature that could help you?
Thank you for taking the time to reply.. yes I have all the AA literature, big book etc. I work the program. And have a higher power. But at the moment I find I just can not connect to it or anything. AA saved me and could solve any problems with it. But now I can’t seem to do anything and get out of this dark place
 
K

karl7

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
603
welcome casper.....AA helped me kick alcohol.....i think those groups are great.....i know how tough depression can be but remember you will get better......have you tried NA?
 
T

treasurebox

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 14, 2018
Messages
265
Location
Philippines
Know and believe that there will be better days.
Music helps me. Music therapy or listening to good and uplifting songs in youtube makes me feel and think better.

Also doing what I love to do which is writing helps me too. What do you love to do? What are you good at? Is it cooking, baking, gardening, doing arts and crafts? Do it and it will make you happy and even be successful.
 
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