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Am I Depressed, Or Is It Something Else???

C

CD1873

New member
Joined
Sep 4, 2008
Messages
3
Location
Aberdeen
Hi there, my names James and I'm a bit of a confused and troubled soul these days. I've suffered from what I always believed was severe depression (for around 15 years). It would go away and then come out of knowhere and destroy my life until I would somehow get the better of it.

However, as I've gotten older I seem to have realised more and more that I don't know who I am (other than very confused). I'm not sure where to start in explaining this, or even what I'm trying to explain.

In short, I was wondering if I maybe have something else. I havent been to a doctor for depression in the last 18 months which is good, but I constantly feel empty, lost, I have no will power to change and do all the things I wanna do, I can't sleep. I don't know if I'm a nice person, a bad person, a weak or strong person. I'm very indecisive, I tend to go through periods of self-destruction where I drink loads and miss lots of work. I feel bad when I'm seeing a girl because I feel tied down and/or that it will eventually not work. I get easily annoyed by really small things, I hide from people by staying at home on my own as much as I can.

To be honest, I feel mentally drained and I have no direction in life.

Why do I have this 'conflicting' set of personalities? Why can't I just 'sort my head out' and start enjoying life?

Anyways, sorry for being such a whinger but need must, lol.

Thanks,

James.
 
honeyquince

honeyquince

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
May 27, 2008
Messages
1,719
Location
Yorkshire
Hi James, and welcome to the forum. I'm sure that you'll find us a supportive bunch. It sounds like you've had a really rough time with depression ofver the years but great that you have managed to cope with these episodes for so long.

Although we're great at many things, one thing we're not good at is diagnosis and the best that I can suggest is to have a chat with your doctor. One idea that's often suggested is to print out your post here and pass it on to your doctor as a way of raising your set of indicators (sorry - can't remember the proper word for it but I hope you know what I mean). This is also a good way to start up a conversation with them. Good luck with this if this is the line that you decide to follow. Do let us know how you get on and keep posting for support!

Take care.
 
Libra1

Libra1

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
515
Location
West Midlands
Hi James and :welcome: to MHF :)

We are a friendly community and try to offer helpful hints and lots of support :)
 
Lozzi_1004

Lozzi_1004

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 28, 2008
Messages
1,850
Location
Yorkshire, UK
Hi James :) Hope you find the support you need here :grouphug:
 
C

C Manchester

Member
Joined
Sep 8, 2008
Messages
10
Location
manchester
WoW

first post i read on ere James,,,,, and a lot of that rang home too Fella. can`t offer advice yet as thats why i`m here, but all ready, whats going on in my head is going on in yours... thats a start for me lol
 
D

Dollit

Guest
Hi James. Try to remember that depression isn't a simple illness - it's easily defined but not simple. Often after a really bad period of depression I have a period of reassessment where I change newspapers (though not for long) or go through periods of not watching much tv (which is current). I find it normal to question myself and who I am as I often feel as though I've been alien to myself.

As long as you come out from the experience stronger then it's okay to question because unless we question we don't get answers.
 
T

Twylight

Guest
I thought I had depression for years

I had some counseling and I realised I had a guilty complex
Once I realised what is what about, i was able to deal with it..
 
B

brody

Member
Joined
Sep 13, 2008
Messages
9
Hi James

Hi there, my names James and I'm a bit of a confused and troubled soul these days. I've suffered from what I always believed was severe depression (for around 15 years). It would go away and then come out of knowhere and destroy my life until I would somehow get the better of it.

However, as I've gotten older I seem to have realised more and more that I don't know who I am (other than very confused). I'm not sure where to start in explaining this, or even what I'm trying to explain.

In short, I was wondering if I maybe have something else. I havent been to a doctor for depression in the last 18 months which is good, but I constantly feel empty, lost, I have no will power to change and do all the things I wanna do, I can't sleep. I don't know if I'm a nice person, a bad person, a weak or strong person. I'm very indecisive, I tend to go through periods of self-destruction where I drink loads and miss lots of work. I feel bad when I'm seeing a girl because I feel tied down and/or that it will eventually not work. I get easily annoyed by really small things, I hide from people by staying at home on my own as much as I can.

To be honest, I feel mentally drained and I have no direction in life.

Why do I have this 'conflicting' set of personalities? Why can't I just 'sort my head out' and start enjoying life?

Anyways, sorry for being such a whinger but need must, lol.

Thanks,

James.
I have very similar symtomes to you, It sounds like you are very depressed and because of this it clouds everything else,

I don't like to be around many people, I get very bad tempered and go through really bad patches, I think it wise to go back to your GP I know they don't fully understand but maybe you need to arrange to get some help were you can talk to a professional about these feelings and thoughts

your not whinging! depression is not an easy thing, don't be so hard on yourself about weather your a nice person or that you don't have any direction in life, deal with one thing at a time

Depression works in funny ways and can make you paranoid about things, it also makes you question alot, Don't panic

Is there mental health support in your area? if your not sure try the NHS website

Hope this helps


Brody
 
scottsblue

scottsblue

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Apr 20, 2008
Messages
1,902
Location
England
i dont think your a bad person, you seem alright to me:)

if you like football maybe you can relate to this. you need a good run in life like a step in stone, somthing to get you started and a smooth run of things so you have somthing behind you and so ur in the right frame of mind.

heres the football part, most of the best things in life can be related to scoreing a Goal, if you want a girlfriend, you got to get ur passing game strait and precise and if you start thinking to much that balls gona end up in the croud. so you need healthy thoughts of posative things about you and what your doing a woosh woosh woosh and that goal will come, wether its a girlfriend you want, a job or somthing new you have a passing interest in.

just try not to think about things to much becuase your just gona stumble.
 
W

wai.lee65

New member
Joined
Oct 5, 2008
Messages
3
Hi there, my names James and I'm a bit of a confused and troubled soul these days. I've suffered from what I always believed was severe depression (for around 15 years). It would go away and then come out of knowhere and destroy my life until I would somehow get the better of it.

However, as I've gotten older I seem to have realised more and more that I don't know who I am (other than very confused). I'm not sure where to start in explaining this, or even what I'm trying to explain.

In short, I was wondering if I maybe have something else. I havent been to a doctor for depression in the last 18 months which is good, but I constantly feel empty, lost, I have no will power to change and do all the things I wanna do, I can't sleep. I don't know if I'm a nice person, a bad person, a weak or strong person. I'm very indecisive, I tend to go through periods of self-destruction where I drink loads and miss lots of work. I feel bad when I'm seeing a girl because I feel tied down and/or that it will eventually not work. I get easily annoyed by really small things, I hide from people by staying at home on my own as much as I can.

To be honest, I feel mentally drained and I have no direction in life.

Why do I have this 'conflicting' set of personalities? Why can't I just 'sort my head out' and start enjoying life?

Anyways, sorry for being such a whinger but need must, lol.

Thanks,

James.
Hi James, im new here and sorry i cant offer any advise, but i do no were your coming from. 99% of what you said is 'ME' i couldnt belive it when i read
it, well guess the only consilation is we now no we are not alone,
ive thought of trying Hypnosis , i' will let you know if it helps
My thoughts are with you

WL
 
T

thindude

Member
Joined
Oct 18, 2008
Messages
9
Location
Lincolnshire
hi

I am new to this site but a lot of that reads true for me.

Thanks
 
mischief

mischief

Well-known member
Admin
Joined
Dec 9, 2007
Messages
13,733
Location
The World
Hi James

How is life going now? It has been a fair while ago since you started this thread.
 
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