• Share. Be Supported. Recover.

    We are a friendly, safe community supporting each other's mental health. We are open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

Always Feeling Blue


Regina Li

New member
Aug 2, 2021
My name is Regina.
I am only 20 but I have been seeing a therapist for almost a decade and on medication for about 4-5 years. I am more or less stable now while on Prozac and abilify but I want to share the times that were most difficult for me.
I have a seemingly mild diagnosis: unspecified anxiety disorder. But I sometimes feel the diagnosis is wrong. During the worst periods, I could spend the entire day thinking obsessively about the most irrelevant, random things. I couldn’t force myself to watch a movie, eating takes at least an hour. I would stay in the bathroom every time for an hour leading me to avoid going to bathroom. That causes me to occasionally just pee, even poop all over myself when at home.
Now things are better, but I still must spend 3-4 hours each day here and there just thinking. I could be anxious about what to buy for lunch, how much time I will spend on my homework that day, or did I sounded desperate when asking my friend for their class schedule next semester so we can try to be in same classes...
I am doing average in school now but sometimes I just get reminded of how hardworking and full of potential I was in middle school. I have learned to make peace with my illness, even when my psychiatrist says it is possible I will need medication for the rest of my life. I am trying to take this step by step but sometimes it just seems if it weren’t for my mother’s help, I would be on the streets already. Sometimes it just seems like there is so little hope...

Alexander Ypsilantis

Mar 3, 2020
I'm no trained Psychiatrist, but you might want to have one look into OCD. From what you wrote, you may have issues in that regard. I have had, so I know a little about it. Good luck.

Regina Li

New member
Aug 2, 2021
I'm no trained Psychiatrist, but you might want to have one look into OCD. From what you wrote, you may have issues in that regard. I have had, so I know a little about it. Good luck.
Thanks for the suggestion, but my psychiatrist already took that into account. It just doesn’t appear on my diagnosis.


Well-known member
May 5, 2021
Paris, France
Depression is hard Regina. Welcome to the forums. You'll find a lot of people have similar thoughts of guilt and feel that they're not living to their fullest potential. I also admit that I spend an hour in the bathroom and I don't feel motivated to do anything. It's a long hard struggle and I'm still in it, so I can only send you love and motivation. KEep seeing your doctor and listen to him, and with time, you can hope that the depression subsides, althought sometimes it stays on for a long time or keeps coming back every now and then.
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
S Feeling depressed due to turning 30 and having always been single and a virgin Depression Forum 61
D That sinking feeling...always. Depression Forum 1
H Advice about when everyone always blame you for everything and feeling powerless Depression Forum 2
T Always feeling really depressed and low :( Depression Forum 3
MrBond007 Fed up of always being put down by people. Just want to be loved and appreciated. Depression Forum 2
KittyCat92 Everyone always leaves Depression Forum 33
B I will always be single Depression Forum 11
N My past always comes back to haunt me Depression Forum 4
RadioHush it always gets better :) Depression Forum 5
GaryC123 Once a loser, always a loser in romance Depression Forum 21
T I will always be lonely Depression Forum 112
Sandinic Always alone Depression Forum 4
I Why does it always happen when I’m upset? Depression Forum 3
M Why do people always say that "life is precious"? Depression Forum 20
H Always in a bad state Depression Forum 5
W Always alone Depression Forum 15
K Always tired and cant contact doctor. Depression Forum 2
J No matter what I do, if something goes wrong I always get overwhelmed with negativity, leading to dark thoughts. How do I stop this? Depression Forum 8
TheGirlWithThePearlEarring I always knew it would happen Depression Forum 10
E I’m always Sleepy Depression Forum 17
S always in my head..voices screaming to kill myself Depression Forum 2
Sorry state Downwards, always downwards Depression Forum 9
B Is suicide always have concrete reason? Depression Forum 9
N Will I always feel this way?? Depression Forum 7
H Why am I always so nasty? Depression Forum 2
Fairy Lucretia i always think Depression Forum 7
M It's always difficult! Depression Forum 2
nickybow86 Sick and tired of always being sick and tired Depression Forum 4
B Why do I always do this!! Depression Forum 1
S Why do I always get so depressed when I have to go to bed? Depression Forum 3
I why do people dessert you when you need them the most and i wad always there for them? Depression Forum 3
M Always Depression Forum 6
N I'll always be depressed Depression Forum 4
J Is depression always a mental illness? Depression Forum 9
H Are Doctors always right? Depression Forum 3
student12 Rain always MAKES ME DEPRESSED AM I GOING NUTS? AGAIN OR WHAT Depression Forum 10
J Always Down Depression Forum 7
Sharyhn Why does it always rain on me... Depression Forum 3
F Traditional treatment for depression is not always the answer Depression Forum 2
Y Why do I always have to wear a mask Depression Forum 13
R depressed, always, but more.... Depression Forum 1
OobieMoobie why does it always come back though? Depression Forum 5
J There's always tomorrow. Depression Forum 4
Y Why is it always the same? Depression Forum 76
raven always rejected Depression Forum 4
S Feeling really low and unloved Depression Forum 6
Linda1989 Start feeling depressed all of sudden Depression Forum 1
L feeling bit better Depression Forum 8
N Major depressive disorder and feeling hopeless Depression Forum 2
M Afraid of feeling okay? Depression Forum 1

Similar threads