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Alls not too good but whar too do

megirl

megirl

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Everything has been going well work wise really enjoy it love my dog
But all of a sudden I didn't well chose not to recognise the signs, I have been avoiding friends
Last night a friend of mine would have not chosen no too be the answer in a nice way so I did go and despite it all I enjoyed myself.
Today I have isolated again

I get so agitated over nothing
 
megirl

megirl

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Other than that just avoiding people
Guess once the new year has arrived all will be fine
 
megirl

megirl

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I feel annoyed with myself!!
I've been and bought crap I don't need and don't want!!
Getting agitated on the road!! I'm meant to be a health professional and should know better..

And seeing my clients this evening jumping out of my car locking it wonder why my lights are flashing.. Umm motors still running.
Rang to visit a client at home for am assessment and of course she must be a friend of my mother's says ..'huh I don't want to see you ' in a nasty tone (I only realised she knew of my mother but anyway, spent the day in the office on the phone etc almost in tears and shaking like a leaf!?

Came home bawled my eyes out and my beautiful dog knew something was wrong, sat beside me stayed by myself the whole time I was home ..that's real love
 
Lunar Lady

Lunar Lady

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Sorry you're going through a rough patch, Megirl.

Be gentle with yourself and slow down if your mind is foggy and you're forgetting things.

Sometimes, we need a damn good cry to get things out of our system.

Hope you have a good day, today :hug:
 
megirl

megirl

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All the lies my mother would have told people..
I feel like the child within is screaming wanting to tell everyone the truth..
All the things she's probably told them about me all the shit and lack of being nurtured by her,
Feel a little pissed off
 
megirl

megirl

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Thanks Lunar Lady yes that is a blimmen good thing xx
I just need to get through this bit of a rough patch,
Maybe I will take a friend out for lunch Monday we will both love that xx
Need to re focus
 
megirl

megirl

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Its starting to be that time of year again that I know is hard for many
 
daffy

daffy

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@megirl sorry your having a rough patch. I always think that leading up to christmas can be a depressing time especially when your on your own (i am as well) but if you think its more than that please see your doctor . Try and ignore what that silly woman said . Your doing a great job and from what you say your employers are happy with your work. And as for your mum well words fail me. Not everyone that is a mum is fit to be a one. I know mine wasnt.
You can always have a rant on here , ive done it on many occasion . :hug:
 
megirl

megirl

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Yes Daffy, thank you always feel better getting it out here,
Its hard sometimes when you know the truth and others have no idea what that person has done.
xx
Thanks yr words help
 
megirl

megirl

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And yes putting it into perspective my boss and collegues are amazing to work for.
I make the odd oversight nothing major and my boss is always so nice and reassuring about it all.

If everyone could get jobs like that..the world would be great.
And yep if I still keep getting overwhelmed so easily I will see my doctor
Over xmas you will probably see more of me x
 
megirl

megirl

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People should be assessed before they have kids I reckon
 
megirl

megirl

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When distressed it's so hard to see the bigger picture.
 
megirl

megirl

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I guess I often want to tell others all she did to me and what I gave her with nothing in return especially after my car accident ...then yeh why should I try justify myself I want to believe me but it will always be about her.
My dog was so loving when I was in distress today, seeing her he gets distressed if I'm not in sight.
All she does is wacks him on the head patting a dog they love it but patting is different than smacking them on the head
 
Lunus

Lunus

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I guess I often want to tell others all she did to me and what I gave her with nothing in return especially after my car accident ...then yeh why should I try justify myself I want to believe me but it will always be about her.
My dog was so loving when I was in distress today, seeing her he gets distressed if I'm not in sight.
All she does is wacks him on the head patting a dog they love it but patting is different than smacking them on the head
Right my girl think it’s time for me to interject lol. Okay, what you have done of late is lose the art of being mindful. That is, living in the present moment, without judgement and to stop ruminating about the past and to stop projecting into the future. Doing this will only trigger negative emotions, which in turn leads to self destructive coping mechanisms and suffering. So try to focus purely on the present moment. Focus on an object or your surroundings. Really focus on where you are, sounds you may hear. Then try to regulate your breathing. Slow deep breaths. Focus on breathing in and out, the feeling in the mouth, the nostrils. Try to just slow yourself right down. Right down to calmness.
Then, when you are emotionally ready, you must try to tackle Radical Acceptance. That is accepting who you are and all that has happened to get you there, without judging yourself negatively. Conquer this and you will find peace of mind. x
 
G

Girl interupted

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The thing with isolation is that it self perpetuates depression.

try to get out hon. Even if you don’t feel like it.
 
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