Alcoholic Mother. She can be really mean but she gives me my space. My ex would verbally abuse me for hours on end and then I had to sleep next to him and have sex. He started to grab my throat during arguments and lifted me off the ground by my neck. He also tried to kill me. My mom gets drunk but she is heaven compared to him.
How do we get attracted towards these wrong kinds of people?
We are attracted to the kinds of people we are familiar with, the kinds of people who create the same feelings in us as were instilled in us growing up. We buy into what it is familiar to us. We have a gravitational pull towards it. UNTIL we find our awareness, until we educate ourselves about what we truly deserve and own that we deserve it.
That's what you're doing, right now, when you make a thread about the boyfriend and you identify him as "abusive" and ask what is the better situation to be in. I believe you're making steps towards believing you deserve better. Which you do.
Now, in terms of what's a lesser evil, sounds like your mother in this situation, if you currently do have no other option in terms of residence but couple that with therapy and make sure u get outside of the house enough
You don't need a random stranger on the internet to lose your boyfriend. Come on. What good is he bringing you?!