• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

Alcohol, Drugs, Mental Illness - Can Anyone Help My Dad?

T

tashaxx

New member
Joined
Feb 12, 2009
Messages
2
Hello everyone

I have joined this forum and several others as I am trying to seek out some answers and direction on what I should be doing. My dad has suffered from mental illness since as long ago as I can remember. Times have always been tough but I have got to the point where I do not know where to turn as the much needed support isn't there.

I have memories from as early as 9 years old and I am now 26 fighting the same uphill struggle. My dad clearly has mental health issues but know one seems to be willing to help.

It all started with alcoholism until the hospital told him his liver would soon fail and that he could not continue to drink. From this point onwards he stopped drinking and started using hard drugs. Things got worse soon after when my grandfather (his dad) passed away and he combined drink and drugs resulting in my family life at home being a misery.

- he became abusive to my mother, brother and I
- he started hearing voices and hallucinating thinking people were out to kill him
- he would be confused as to what day it was and who close friends were
- on several occasions he has turned the gas on to light a cigarette and left it on causing the house to fill with gas
- he has roamed the streets with weapons as a consequence of hearing voices
- he doesn’t know who he is most days, with short term memory loss which has led to him using my wall as well of the rest of the house as a toilet

I would like to stress that none of the above are one off events and there are many others.

My mum could not take it anymore and he moved out into his own flat but this later ended in trouble due to the drug taking. He then moved in with his elderly mother but this did not stop any of his habits and she later told him to leave and never return.

From this point we sought help from doctors, hospitals, runwell, etc to have him assessed under the mental health act. He was later put on medication but again could not take his medication responsibly and subsequently tried to overdose many times. We continued to press the authorities for help but no one has been willing to help purely blaming the alcohol and drug problems as the cause.

It became apparent that he was on the wrong medication which took years to eventually resolve with the doctors and get changed. After all the years consulting with doctors and hospitals we are now banging our heads against a brick wall as know one is willing to look at him and help, as he desperately needs to either be sectioned or cared for by professionals. I found it incredible that our prayers have yet to be answered when a lot of the things he does are not only a danger to himself but to his family, and everyone else around him. We can’t sleep at night through worry of what might happen.

I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this and offer any kind of advice. I feel that I have nowhere left to turn but to others who might have been through something similar to this and who can hopefully offer some resolve.

Thanks x
 
T

Twylight

Guest
Hi Tasha and welcome

If he refuses to take his Meds nobody can help him !!!
 
T

tashaxx

New member
Joined
Feb 12, 2009
Messages
2
Hi Twylight

He does take the medication, its just irresponsibly. An example of this is taking it all in one go (1 months worth). And then drinking alcohol

Tashaxx
 
Last edited:
D

Dollit

Guest
Tasha if your dad is an alcoholic and an addict then there is nothing that the medics can do if he refuses to stop or to acknowledge that he has a problem. The state of his liver and the problems you say he has indicate that he is quite a way down the line and that stopping could be quite a shock for his system to cope with.

That's hard to hear I know and I am speaking from personal experience. My ex husband almost died from his alcoholism and I have nearly 18 years recovery so I do know how it is.

Go to this site http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/ which is especially for families of alcoholics and start living for yourself.

And keep coming back here if it helps you. Someone will always listen.
 
M

maudikie

Guest
I should talk again t the cousellors first, It may come to leaving home. You are now 26 and should h ave a life of your own. Also tell our G>P. andsee if he can persuade your father to take treatment for isalcohol and drug poblems.
Tke care.
 
R

ramboghettouk

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Jan 7, 2008
Messages
16,611
Location
london
My women friend who my psychiatrist calls my service user girlfriend keeps on coming off meds and i don't know what to do, i'm told by some thats her right, but she gets violent, i feel bad because maybe i'm having her drugged up to get her into bed, i also feel that with the no of wo,men who say they would end a relationship if they're partner was diagnosed schitzoprenic, a recent study, that who else would have me.

Seems to me she's prepared to claim mental illness for housing etc but not to take meds and at the same time expects people to use it as an excuse for her behaviour, that fits a lot of my neighbours as it happens
 
D

Dollit

Guest
That fits quite a lot of people Rambo - not everyone wants to get as well as they can be. You and I are high functioning which just confuses most people anyway as they associate it with health not coping abilities.
 
M

maudikie

Guest
To Rambo.

If all else has failed I think I should leave.:(
 
Top