Ah the old panic attacks and agoraphobia....

[Talith]

I've read through a few of these threads and couldn't agree more with what you are all saying about how panic attacks affect you. Getting out of the front door requires more courage than I have. I can get into our car and be driven somewhere but if it is not a door to door job and I have to get out and walk anywhere my confidence goes to zilch. Last week I had a massive attack in the town where I grew up, we had to go down to see my ill cousin and needing to buy a new address book we stopped off first to go into Smiths. Where I have been many many times in the past. Not a good idea. The eyes went into tunnel vision and I started to shake and sweat. It was all I could do to get back to the car even with hubby by my side. Trouble is I just want to scream at him to move! when it happens as although he is very understanding, he has never suffered them.

They are just so debilitating and depressing, and never ending. Yes, I've tried all the pills etc and nothing has worked. I find that Kalms tablets take the edge off them sometimes though. Sometimes I completely despair, as I know I will never have a normal life. My first attack was about 20 years ago and they just progressed from bad to worse to the present state which is unbearable. I feel locked in with no escape from them ever.

 

[DELATEXT]

BANE

PANIC ATTACKS ARE THE BANE OF MY LIFE I REALLY CAN'T GO OUT WITH OUT SOME ONE WITH ME!!
I HAVE TO PLAN EVERYTHING FROM GOING TO THE DOCTOR TO SHOPPING, LUCKILY I A WONDERFUL KEY WORKER WHO ENABLES ME TO COPE WITH GOING OUT.

 

[Talith]

I know. I can't even walk 30 yards on my own to the post box without breaking out in a sweat and wanting to rush home. Which is somewhat difficult as I walk with a stick being disabled as well...... Hubby has to do all the shopping etc and most of the cleaning as well, as the arthritis is not very kind to me. Plus he works. He is a diamond and I am very lucky to have him.

 

[mum52]

hi i have had panic attacks for years they would go away for a while but then come back worse the worsed one happend nearly 5 years ago which also turned into agrophobia i wouldn't be able to go out for months then i would go out if someone was with just for a walk then i would have a bad day and then stay in for months again i have no friends now and i try so hard to get out more i have had diffrent medication but i am not keen on taking them i am going try harder i don't want to stay like this mum52

 

[Talith]

It's a nightmare isn't it? Prescription medication doesn't work at all for me either. I take Kalms tablets which help a bit. I have been trying to get to our new garden centre for the last 3 weeks, but even with hubby with me, getting out of the house is terrifying. I can't imagine what you are going through with no support, it must be absolute hell for you.

By hell or high water I am going to try and beat this. I've got rid of all the nasty people in my life now and I shall never allow anyone to hurt me again, so the only way I can go is UP!!

I'm here if you need me - anytime.

 

[seaview]

in simpathy

I've read through a few of these threads and couldn't agree more with what you are all saying about how panic attacks affect you. Getting out of the front door requires more courage than I have. I can get into our car and be driven somewhere but if it is not a door to door job and I have to get out and walk anywhere my confidence goes to zilch. Last week I had a massive attack in the town where I grew up, we had to go down to see my ill cousin and needing to buy a new address book we stopped off first to go into Smiths. Where I have been many many times in the past. Not a good idea. The eyes went into tunnel vision and I started to shake and sweat. It was all I could do to get back to the car even with hubby by my side. Trouble is I just want to scream at him to move! when it happens as although he is very understanding, he has never suffered them.

They are just so debilitating and depressing, and never ending. Yes, I've tried all the pills etc and nothing has worked. I find that Kalms tablets take the edge off them sometimes though. Sometimes I completely despair, as I know I will never have a normal life. My first attack was about 20 years ago and they just progressed from bad to worse to the present state which is unbearable. I feel locked in with no escape from them ever.

I understand you perfectly it is how I feel, I went better for a few years with CBT the nurse used to come to my house and we started a little at a time, until I could go out at least with somebody then on my own. Last year I got breast cancer and when they told me everything was cleared after the mastectomy then I started again with the panic attacks with more strength than ever. I am having CBT again but this time it doesn't seem to work so well.
I pray that you get better so you can enjoy life, I am hopping I do to a certain degree.
wishing you all the best and don't despair,
Josie

 

[Talith]

Josie, today I had a huge nice surprise. Hubby had a day off and he made me get in the car and drove me all round the coast! It has been a beautiful day weatherwise and the sun sparkling off the sea was such a pleasure. Getting out is very hard for me, but seeing that today has gladdened my heart. It's the simple things that make life better for me, I just wish that I could walk properly again so I could go for long, long walks over the moor as I used to.

You've had terrible troubles with your mastectomy, I cannot even begin to think how you must feel.

Am here if you need me anytime

 

[seaview]

I am REALLY happy about your day

Josie, today I had a huge nice surprise. Hubby had a day off and he made me get in the car and drove me all round the coast! It has been a beautiful day weatherwise and the sun sparkling off the sea was such a pleasure. Getting out is very hard for me, but seeing that today has gladdened my heart. It's the simple things that make life better for me, I just wish that I could walk properly again so I could go for long, long walks over the moor as I used to.

You've had terrible troubles with your mastectomy, I cannot even begin to think how you must feel.

Am here if you need me anytime

Hello talith, I am soooooo glad for you, people don't realize how these little things make us so happy. I am going to a birthday party my grandson will be 4 on Saturday, my partner will come with me, he is great about this whole thing, he says he is not bother that way i haven't go any excuse to get away from him lol.
The cancer and masectomy was hard to cope with as it was a surprise but I knew it would have a beginning and an ending at least for a while, this is going on for ever, with a physical illness people are very sympathetic with this they think you are wak or daft, with a physical illness you can leave in the doctor's hands with this it is YOU nobody else there to give you the magic pill to take it away.

Why don't we get together to invent a magic pill ?

 

[Talith]

I know sweetheart, all doctors think we are talking complete crap (by the way, moderator this is not a swear word it is a short form of the name Thomas Crapper who invented the flush toilet)

A magic pill eh Josie? I wish. I try and find small ones every day. Silly ones, like I play Sky games on the Sky plus box and try and get to the end of the game. Sadly I am not 10 years old and not very competent at them! I go into our small courtyard garden and look at the flowers and veg growing that we have planted out. I watch the cat playing who makes me laugh. I enjoy emails from my new French penfriend. And this all helps me to forget for a short time about having to go out of the front door again and be scared to death. I've only got better about this all since I have been on the MHF I have had so much support.

You enjoy your day with your grandbaby. Hold that happy day in your heart, keep it there and bring it out whenever you feel bad.

Talith x

 

[seaview]

hi just back trom the CPN

I know sweetheart, all doctors think we are talking complete crap (by the way, moderator this is not a swear word it is a short form of the name Thomas Crapper who invented the flush toilet)

A magic pill eh Josie? I wish. I try and find small ones every day. Silly ones, like I play Sky games on the Sky plus box and try and get to the end of the game. Sadly I am not 10 years old and not very competent at them! I go into our small courtyard garden and look at the flowers and veg growing that we have planted out. I watch the cat playing who makes me laugh. I enjoy emails from my new French penfriend. And this all helps me to forget for a short time about having to go out of the front door again and be scared to death. I've only got better about this all since I have been on the MHF I have had so much support.

You enjoy your day with your grandbaby. Hold that happy day in your heart, keep it there and bring it out whenever you feel bad.

Talith x

Thanks for your encouragement, i am just back to see the CPN they are starting CBT again and then long term Psychoanalysis therapy, hopefully it helps not only with the agoraphobia but also with the depression, don't want to go down that road again.
I am enjoying tomorrow at my grandson'''''''''''''''s party, just taking a dfay at a time.

Lets have a cup ot tea Talith, milk one sugar. lol
Talk to you sunday.

 

[the scandinavian]

anxiety its just a word!

This is my first time on this forum i've suffered with anxiety myself over a number of years ,is there a typical anxiety sufferer i don'nt think so ,i thought feelings like this don't happen to people like me,but they can and do and there is no shame in that,remember you are not alone,and you can make yourself well,i found i started avoiding things like supermarkets,queues in traffic,the cinema,airports were a nightmare and the school run etc.can you remember atime when you did'nt feel like you do now latch onto that thought.
I found a good website that helped me and i agree you learn anxiety and panic so you have to unlearn it your not born with it!
Noone ever died of a panic attack you have to front up ,next time you feel anxious tell your mind to do its worst .its what i did hell it can't be any worse than living with anxiety, i recently saw MOTORHEAD live in concert not for the faint hearted!so you can do it!
regards
the scandinavian

 

[Rosepoet]

Hello i suffer panic and Agraphobia i am alone in village with two kids on transport on money. Some days i feel Like giving up. I had post natal depression and got over tip kind me thing before but on energy to do the whole thing again. I made it to the supermarket which is a thirty min walk. I felt i was going to die before i got home. People dont understand it is like you actually think you will die and the only way to get over it is to put yourself in situation and be prepared to die. Then over and over again you must do this and gradually you get your freedom back. I do not know why this has happened to me again but i am just so worn out with worry.

 

[Talith]

Oh Rosepoet I am so sorry. I used to live in a village and even though the local shop was 2 minutes away from our rented flat, I had terrible attacks just getting that far, and if there was a queue in there I would have to go outside and try and compose myself. 30 minutes walk away is a total nightmare. I couldn't do it. And as you say, Scandinavian, however much we think we are going to die we are not. Somehow we have to change our mindset on this.

I try to keep thinking about my friend's son who is now a major rock star. For years he had terrible panic attacks and his fellow band members had to push him onto the stage whenever they played a gig. He and I helped each other through panic attacks, he is now the most confident person in the world. And I think "if Carl can do it, I can" I suppose what helped him most was that he was doing something that he really believed in and was his dream. But I have never had a dream, I have just drifted along and in the process made many wrong decisions and been badly hurt by my own idiocy. Which led to the panic attacks.

Please excuse the woffling!

 

[Star-28]

stay away from caffeine and sugar. exercise is good. a nice walk in the sunlight helps. warm baths with lavander and a good book. soothing music like Enigma. sometimes acceptance will make it easier and learning how to deal with life around the attacks. I take klonopin when I feel very anxious. hope this helps hun.. sorry u feel bad

 

[Talith]

stay away from caffeine and sugar. exercise is good. a nice walk in the sunlight helps. warm baths with lavander and a good book. soothing music like Enigma. sometimes acceptance will make it easier and learning how to deal with life around the attacks. I take klonopin when I feel very anxious. hope this helps hun.. sorry u feel bad

Thanks our kid. I haven't touched caffeine or sugar for many years now. I would love to walk in the sunshine but am disabled and can't walk very far. So I tend to sit in our small garden with next door's terrier woofing away all day... Nice baths with a fag and classical music playing loud are very comforting as you say. Good news, hubby is taking me to Jersey on Saturday! Am very nervous, but am determined to enjoy it.