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Advice please?

U

Unhappy83

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Oct 11, 2021
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England
Hi, does any one here suffer with a stutter?

I have very bad anxiety causing speech blocks and stuttering, which in turn makes me want to avoid social situations. I would avoid a promotion if it meant having to hold team meetings etc.

I just feel so awkward and feel everyone is looking at me, judging me. I won't (or try to avoid) answering phones around other people. Everytime I watch TV and listen to people chatting away so effortlessly, it makes me feel worse.

Many times I can be with someone and I know what I want to say, but literally can't get the words out. So I just stay quiet.

People think I'm shy, but it's just me not being able to effectively communicate. It's easier to just be quiet 😔 I struggle to maintain friendships as I don't like going out.

Stuttering has this stigma attached to it as being something people laugh at. It's affected me massively in my life. I also suffer with PTSD from a childhood trauma.

I just feel so low.
 
H

hairybanana

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G'day unhappy83 👋

I'm so sorry to see how much you've been through. I can't imagine how difficult everything has been for you.

Have you sought help for the anxiety in the past? Do you/have you received treatment for ptsd?
 
U

Unhappy83

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England
G'day unhappy83 👋

I'm so sorry to see how much you've been through. I can't imagine how difficult everything has been for you.

Have you sought help for the anxiety in the past? Do you/have you received treatment for ptsd?
Hi, and thanks for the reply.

I've only tried CBT for anxiety before covid came along. They touched a little on PTSD but her main thing was to focus on the now, rather than many years ago.

I went to my GP earlier this year, as the constant anxiety is causing me to feel depressed. I was prescribed sertraline but I haven't taken any yet.
 
H

hairybanana

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Hi, and thanks for the reply.

I've only tried CBT for anxiety before covid came along. They touched a little on PTSD but her main thing was to focus on the now, rather than many years ago.

I went to my GP earlier this year, as the constant anxiety is causing me to feel depressed. I was prescribed sertraline but I haven't taken any yet.
Sertraline helped me immensely with anxiety. Not much for the depression but anxiety has done a 180 pretty much.
Cbt isn't going to do Jack shit for treating anxiety if it's stemming from ptsd. You'll wanna see a trauma informed therapist. That'll be a game changer. A lot of the anxiety you feel can be a symptom of ptsd--anxiety tends to spike with that. I think if you can get the right treatment and meds for the ptsd issue then it will in turn help reduce your anxiety. I think if you do that you might be able to conquer the stammer 👍
 
U

Unhappy83

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England
Thanks very much for your thoughts.

I will take it on board and see what help I can get.

It seems like a viscous circle....the anxiety is triggering the stutter, and the stutter triggers the anxiety. The PTSD is from a childhood trauma 30 years ago.

It's affecting my relationship as I generally feel so crap.

Thanks again for the reply
Sertraline helped me immensely with anxiety. Not much for the depression but anxiety has done a 180 pretty much.
Cbt isn't going to do Jack shit for treating anxiety if it's stemming from ptsd. You'll wanna see a trauma informed therapist. That'll be a game changer. A lot of the anxiety you feel can be a symptom of ptsd--anxiety tends to spike with that. I think if you can get the right treatment and meds for the ptsd issue then it will in turn help reduce your anxiety. I think if you do that you might be able to conquer the stammer 👍
 
H

hairybanana

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Thanks very much for your thoughts.

I will take it on board and see what help I can get.

It seems like a viscous circle....the anxiety is triggering the stutter, and the stutter triggers the anxiety. The PTSD is from a childhood trauma 30 years ago.

It's affecting my relationship as I generally feel so crap.

Thanks again for the reply
Hope I was able to help some👍
 
Joe57

Joe57

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I had a stutter for a couple years, after my parents died. Eventually I figured out a strategy to limit my communication to words that were less likely to cause me to stutter, and be really efficient when communicating, to lessen the opportunities.

remember everybody has flaws, we are all human. just because your flaws are more visible doesn’t diminish your value as a person.

focus on the the positive. Keep thinking about the good things about you, over and over, don’t dwell on the other stuff.
 
Wishbone

Wishbone

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I have very bad anxiety causing speech blocks and stuttering
It seems like a viscous circle....the anxiety is triggering the stutter, and the stutter triggers the anxiety.
A lot of problems to do with anxiety, especially social anxiety, come from thinking what others might be thinking. So rather than just focusing on you and what you're doing, you're trying to do your thing AND also thinking "Oh God, what if I do this!" and that it quite literally blocking your thoughts and in turn what comes out of your mouth. It's not a quick fix, very few things are, but focusing on this one part I think will help you a lot. You need to change the way you think with regards to other people and focus on you, ignore them, focus on you. The stutter only happens because of this it seems so once you stop this it should go, right? So don't think about the stutter and don't think about other people, just focus on doing what you're doing, and that also includes not preparing what you're going to say in your own head like a script...because that still shows that you are thinking of others because you're planning on not messing up!
More help here if you get a chance for a bit of a read through some things: Social Anxiety Self Help | Get.gg - Getselfhelp.co.uk
 
U

Unhappy83

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Joined
Oct 11, 2021
Messages
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Location
England
A lot of problems to do with anxiety, especially social anxiety, come from thinking what others might be thinking. So rather than just focusing on you and what you're doing, you're trying to do your thing AND also thinking "Oh God, what if I do this!" and that it quite literally blocking your thoughts and in turn what comes out of your mouth. It's not a quick fix, very few things are, but focusing on this one part I think will help you a lot. You need to change the way you think with regards to other people and focus on you, ignore them, focus on you. The stutter only happens because of this it seems so once you stop this it should go, right? So don't think about the stutter and don't think about other people, just focus on doing what you're doing, and that also includes not preparing what you're going to say in your own head like a script...because that still shows that you are thinking of others because you're planning on not messing up!
More help here if you get a chance for a bit of a read through some things: Social Anxiety Self Help | Get.gg - Getselfhelp.co.uk
Thanks for the reply..

Definitely need to try and change the way I think - it's just constant negative thoughts which consumes me every single day.

But its difficult to not think about it as it's been there for so many years 😔

I'll have a read of the link you shared - thanks again
 
F

Fairytale

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Oct 19, 2021
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Warsaw
I can really relate to it. I also prefer to not to speak because I hate my way of communication when I am afraid. I don't have stuttering but I have difficulty with constructing sentences and I stop to breath so my voice is breaking. I try to control it to make my voices sounding normally but it usually is not :(
As child or then during studying I've had many situations when I wanted to say sth but physically I was not able to do it because of very strong barrier.

For stuttering I've seen some centers that are specialising in treatment of it. The method is called the Speech Normalization Therapy (not sure how to translate it) by Lilia Harutyunyan. However I am from Poland but for sure in England there is sth similar.
 
SoftRain

SoftRain

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I read on here somewhere that someone was put on anxiety meds and it decreased their stutter immensely
 
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