Advice Please

[Abbiesc1]

Evening everyone,

I don’t really know when it began, but for as long as I can remember I have always always hated the reflection I see in the mirror.

Nothing can change how I feel about myself , I can try different hair styles, different makeup, different clothing Styles and I never feel attractive.

I’m always convincing myself that I’m not good enough for partners and convince myself that they can always do better than me because Of how I look or that they will go elsewhere even though I Have a big heart and a lot of love to give to someone.

As you can probably imagine this creates a lot of stress for me and also puts pressure on any relationship I am in

During lockdown I have had a lot of time deep In my own thoughts and I’ve started to accept that this is becoming a huge problem for me and I want to get some help to stop this being a permanent battle.

I have spent money on different brands of makeup and hair extensions the lot but none of it brings me any content. All I want is to feel like I can accept myself and not feel so low about my appearance.

If anyone has ever suffered from any of these things it would be really interesting and helpful to hear from you and how certain things have helped you overcome these feelings.
Thank you in advance,

Abi x

 

[PerpetuallyStuck]

Welcome to the forum. I'm male so I've never had to worry about the use of makeup. I do feel self conscious about my appearance though. I can relate to not feeling good enough around the opposite sex. It always feel like they are superior to me.

You sound like you put a lot of effort in to how you look, and I'm sure you look fine. I think that you could do with boosting confidence. It's really difficult to do so though. I should listen to my own advice!

 

[Abbiesc1]

Welcome to the forum. I'm male so I've never had to worry about the use of makeup. I do feel self conscious about my appearance though. I can relate to not feeling good enough around the opposite sex. It always feel like they are superior to me.

You sound like you put a lot of effort in to how you look, and I'm sure you look fine. I think that you could do with boosting confidence. It's really difficult to do so though. I should listen to my own advice!

Hello there ! Thank you very much for your reply! It’s very intresting to hear from a males perspective! I do try and do my makeup most days before going out or running errands. It’s almost like a mask for me. Have you ever been to see anyone about these feelings?

 

[PerpetuallyStuck]

Hello there ! Thank you very much for your reply! It’s very intresting to hear from a males perspective! I do try and do my makeup most days before going out or running errands. It’s almost like a mask for me. Have you ever been to see anyone about these feelings?

I've seen all sorts of people about it. One to one psychology, group meetups etc. It doesn't help. I'm also from Cornwall by the way...the mental health services have been really poor at understanding my situation. They always tell me "I need to help myself before others can help me" and generally fob me off. I would encourage you to seek help though. It may work for you. I have Social Anxiety Disorder. It makes it hard for me to go out and meet people. Have you been diagnosed with anything, or have you not been assessed by anyone yet?

 

[Abbiesc1]

I've seen all sorts of people about it. One to one psychology, group meetups etc. It doesn't help. I'm also from Cornwall by the way...the mental health services have been really poor at understanding my situation. They always tell me "I need to help myself before others can help me" and generally fob me off. I would encourage you to seek help though. It may work for you. I have Social Anxiety Disorder. It makes it hard for me to go out and meet people. Have you been diagnosed with anything, or have you not been assessed by anyone yet?

Im very sorry to hear that you’ve not had any luck with the local health services ! Good to know your also from Cornwall! I have self referred to Outlook Southwest but due to the current crisis obviously not heard back as yet.
Social anxiety must be a tough one, I so struggle with anxiety but not so much socially. I’m currently on citalopram for depression and have been for some years now. Im hopeful that Outlook could provide some help for this issue. As I dread to think of after accepting this issue that it will be something I would have to deal with alone. I really hope you find a suitable form of help soon