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Advice needed - therapy options

S

so sad

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 24, 2016
Messages
164
I have a dilemma and need advice.

Bit of background – I’ve had a lot of therapy over the years, traditional psychotherapy, CBT and DBT. DBT taught me a lot of skills to use to help me manage my emotions and feelings but I’ve hit a really bad spell and the skills just aren’t working. When the DBT finished I was put on a self-compassion course which did nothing. My key issue is no self-worth. Growing up my parents had huge expectations of me and if I ever failed to meet them I was in a lot of trouble. I’m now an adult but I’m still scared of them disapproving of anything I do. This affects me massively. I also have huge problems with my relationship which is controlling and affects my self-worth.
I’ve decided to access some counselling through work but only 6 sessions and 1 was taken up doing all the initial background stuff. She told me that basically we can’t sort it (the stuff with my parents/self-worth) in 5 sessions and that I need to decide how I want to use the time. Do I want to talk about the now and how to manage the emotions or do I want to try to chunk up the past and work on one? I think talking about the now is a waste of her time. I have the DBT skills and I think if I can address the old stuff then I’ll be able to use those skills better. I want to address the old stuff but struggling to see how I can chunk it up. What I don’t want to do is open up the flood gates to a whole history of crap and then run out of sessions before putting the lid back on.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks
 
Mal84

Mal84

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Joined
Jan 15, 2020
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1,512
Location
Hovering in the Atlantic
Could you go back to the people who have organised the counselling and see whether there any any other kind of options?

I don’t think it was fair that you were allowed to open up so much in that session to then be told to basically make a choice.

Would you be able to go back to where you got the other therapies and ask if you could access something else via them? You’ve also got the option of private therapy.

I do think it would be a good idea to go to the other five sessions. Maybe go through how you are feeling now after telling your story because I can imagine how tough that was and maybe try and work out some action plan in accessing help in the future?
 
G

Girl interupted

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Joined
Nov 17, 2018
Messages
2,125
It’s really really hard to address the old stuff in six sessions. I would encourage you to address the now, and then find long term therapy options for the long term stuff.
 
Not_here

Not_here

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Joined
May 6, 2019
Messages
160
Location
Ingerland
I have some advise but its really bad and may make everything worse...

So i shouldn't... what am i doing here


Im not here
 
S

so sad

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 24, 2016
Messages
164
Thanks for the advice. I'm trying to see if the CMHT will look at offering me something but I'm having problems with them replacing my care co-ordinator so I'm not holding my breath. I think private might be the best option but then its finding the money. When I finished the DBT I swore to myself that I wouldn't do 1-2-1 therapy again as I get too attached and find the ending too traumatic but realistically I think I need to sort stuff out.
I feel so vulnerable and just want something/someone to wave that magic wand to make it all go away - seriously wishful thinking I know :low:
 
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