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addicted to taking overdoses x

Shingle

Shingle

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I used to do that, only do it now when extremely stressed like esa assessment time or other major stress. It does something to my brain that i cannot seem to manage and so i will take tablets. It makes me feel better too, like there you go, i have just tried to kill myself and now i feel a bit better because i will die eventually. It is like a minor version of a suicide attempt, because there is a tiny bit of hope perhaps.

It is hard to explain and hard to understand. Maybe it is an act that feels like drinking a bottle of wine or self harm that is visible. There are so many ways to harm yourself and they are all not good, but taking tablets, more than you need or should take, i think that might be the worst for me.

I don't do it anymore as i said, unless major stress is happening. Also those racing thoughts and depressive thinking but lots of energy and the need to listen to certain types of music. This is when it is a problem for me. A quick overdose and then get on with my day whereas drinking will stop the day and require sobering up. I'm talking about certain tablets here that do damage organs long term. Organ damage, even minor, just makes life harder. Ulcers and urinating problems, needing to buy gaviscon, such pain there, problems with peeing, all very annoying where there is already so much to disrupt your peace.

I am talking in general here and i hope that is ok.

Stress, it must be that. Drowning in a situation you cannot get out of.
 
Shingle

Shingle

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I have just seen that you have possibly taken something and maybe too much? You can drink activated charcoal but it has to be quick. If you might have taken too much, you could go to the hospital but they may just monitor you but also they can put you on a drip and that will help your kidneys.

You could call 111 for advice on what to do at home if you don't want to go anywhere.
 
Mayflower7

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Lu,
Please phone 999 and go to hospital, you don't need to punish yourself.
Hugs
 
Shingle

Shingle

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Don't ever worry about worrying people. It is important you are open about how you feel.
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

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I don't know what to do
im truly lost all I want to do all the time is hurt myself by overdosing
nobody understands it is the only thing that makes me feel calm
im feeling very hopeless right now

I cant stop I cant im feeling all scared and unwell and if I go in there now and do it the feelings of despair will go away until tomorrow
idk what to do
please don't phone me anyone I feel too ill x
 
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iWILLOBTAINMENTALHEALTH2

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I don't know what to do
im truly lost all I want to do all the time is hurt myself by overdosing
nobody understands it is the only thing that makes me feel calm
im feeling very hopeless right now

I cant stop I cant im feeling all scared and unwell and if I go in there now and do it the feelings of despair will go away until tomorrow
idk what to do
please don't phone me anyone I feel too ill x
Have you thought about will full mental hospital admission? It may be the best choice for you. You are very precious and the world needs more people like you in it. Please get help and take care of yourself. You deserve to live life. Much love Fairy Lucretia. 🤗
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Lu,
You will feel worse after taking an OD, we do understand.
You need more self care plans in place.
Please ring your crisis team.
I know you just want to sleep.
Please take care and don't hurt yourself.
 
E

EstherRose94

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Your scary feelings will pass on their own without that too you can do it. We’re here for you.
 
daffy

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Lu please get help for yourself. There’s so many people on here that care about you. You need to find out what it is that you find so hard to cope with that make you take such risks. You could be doing all sorts of long term damage to yourself by doing this xx
 
vanish

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Hey Lu, I remember the feeling of not being in control and taking purposeful overdoses with prescription medication. Like you, all I wanted to do was sleep. My life I realise now, was very chaotic back then. Overdosing was the only real control I had.
With therapy, I learned what I needed to do to change the chaos around me and surround myself in an environment where I wasn’t as stressed. Yes there are still times I think about hurting myself again, but I figure they’re just thoughts and they pass eventually.
We all want you to be safe Lu, can you please get in touch with your crisis team? Hopefully they will be able to help you and give you some added support. I’d hate for something awful like liver disease to happen!
 
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iWILLOBTAINMENTALHEALTH2

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How are you feeling today?
 
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