Idk whether you’re allowed to say what you took but i hope that you’re okay. You’re not weak or a failure. It’s normal to want to feel better when you’re anxious.
Like others have said you’ll have to find something else that works; we can help you find it. Just make sure you’re safe for tonight and tomorrow we’ll start figuring out what some of fairy lu’s tools to beat anxiety are.
Please Lu you need to see your GP or pdoc. There will be other medication that would work better for you and stop you feeling so low. .have you thought about doing a course of CBT on low self esteem. This NHS page is a good start Raising low self-esteem