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Acute anxiety & Moderate/Severe Depression

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LouieLou

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Sep 1, 2021
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Finally after battling intrusive suicidal thoughts, with my mum and husband's intervention my psychiatrist appointment got fast tracked. I saw the psychiatrist today and diagnosed with acute anxiety and depression which i already knew since June. Scared of this episode, if the new meds don't work in next 7 days I will need to go into hospital as an inpatient which i've agreed to rather than co tinted deteriorating and end up acting on thoughts due to sleep deprivation and depression. He's prescribed 25mg quetiapine morning 50mg quetiapine lunch and 100-125mg night and told to expect to feel out of it and stay in bed watching TV if need be. They think my sleep hormones are out if sync in my brain so prescribed me 7 day supply of expensive melatonin tablets 2mg to get sleep as the amount of sleep I am managing to get at night is diminishing rapidly. During my last major depressive episodes sleep deprivation insomnia has been one of my relapse indicators. Home treatment team crisis is coming to visit for next 7 days. If they feel I'm continuing to go downhill will arrange to find me an inpatient bed. I'm told its work related stress exhaustion induced depression. He also said if needed to stay in bed. I am scared, my mum and husband have been told to look after the kids to give me a chance to recover. Anyone ever had something like this? How do you stop thinking to give neds chance to kick in and recover?
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

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hi ,i just wanted to say i truly hope you feel better soon and that hospital is not needed
treat yourself well and take good care x Lu x
 
Bod

Bod

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I am sorry you are feeling so bad but it will get better for you, depression and anxiety go together side by side and they will effect us physically mentally and emotionally and it is so draining on us and we can see no way out, but the more we talk and get the help off our doctors as well. We have to dig so deep into our own minds that we think why bother, but if we give it a chance and dig deep then we can slowly come out of it and that dark cloud over us starts to fade away.
 
calypso

calypso

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We have a list of numbers which may be of help to you. I hope you can continue to fight off the intrusive thoughts

If you're feeling like you want to die, it's important to tell someone.

Help and support is available right now if you need it. You do not have to struggle with difficult feelings alone.

Phone a helpline

These free helplines are there to help when you're feeling down or desperate.

You can also call these helplines for advice if you’re worried about someone else.

In the UK and Ireland, call the Samaritans on 116123.
In the US, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline ion 1-800-273-8255.
In Canada, call the Suicide Prevention Service on 1.833.456.4566.
In Australia, call Lifeline on 131114.
In New Zealand, call Need to Talk on 1737 or 080017371737.
For other countries please visit this list of crisis helplines.

If you have been affected by the contents of this thread and would like to speak to someone about your feelings you can also call one of the above helplines.

Emergency help

If you are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number (in the UK call 999, in the USA or Canada call 911, in Australia call 000 and in New Zealand call 111 or call the international emergency number of 112).
 
L

linning123

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Joined
Sep 8, 2021
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kathmandu
Finally after battling intrusive suicidal thoughts, with my mum and husband's intervention my psychiatrist appointment got fast tracked. I saw the psychiatrist today and diagnosed with acute anxiety and depression which i already knew since June. Scared of this episode, if the new meds don't work in next 7 days I will need to go into hospital as an inpatient which i've agreed to rather than co tinted deteriorating and end up acting on thoughts due to sleep deprivation and depression. He's prescribed 25mg quetiapine morning 50mg quetiapine lunch and 100-125mg night and told to expect to feel out of it and stay in bed watching TV if need be. They think my sleep hormones are out if sync in my brain so prescribed me 7 day supply of expensive melatonin tablets 2mg to get sleep as the amount of sleep I am managing to get at night is diminishing rapidly. During my last major depressive episodes sleep deprivation insomnia has been one of my relapse indicators. Home treatment team crisis is coming to visit for next 7 days. If they feel I'm continuing to go downhill will arrange to find me an inpatient bed. I'm told its work related stress exhaustion induced depression. He also said if needed to stay in bed. I am scared, my mum and husband have been told to look after the kids to give me a chance to recover. Anyone ever had something like this? How do you stop thinking to give neds chance to kick in and recover?
donot worry and just share your bad feeling as mare as possible this will make your heart feel light and good i'm here to listen your feelings.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Rest
You WILL get better
Your body is demanding you rest by making you feel awful so do what it says :)
Rest your mind also
You could give yourself a massage with some body cream, after a nice bath
If your mind is noisy, you could put the radio on, maybe classic fm
If you become very anxious, get a cup of tea, it helps me
 
L

LouieLou

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Sep 1, 2021
Messages
126
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Wales
Luckily the intrusive thoughts are fleeting but for someone who used to work supporting people with severe mental health problems its ironic its me now ongthe other side. Its worse when I am tired, I don't hear voices its like a fleeting image in my head like when you leave a supermarket or shop and realise you have forgotten milk. I miss it being in control of my mind when they happen, the not being in the driving seat of my mind scares me the most. To be clear I don't want to die. Prior to all episodes I'd be the optimistic realist its just I worry if these tablets don't rebalance my mind the intrusive thoughts will become more frequrnt and I will be on a downward spiral. I said up very had random intrusive thoughts one was awful kids driwnjng in bath and said to the psychiatrist i would never dream harming my kids. So that's how I recognised how ill what started as physical symptoms of work related stress and anxiety spiralled 8nto a psychiatrist depressive episode. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers this week as I would rather stay at home in mum'# house or my house when on the road to recovery x
 
L

LouieLou

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Wales
Also I don't neglect my kids despite my episode, they are always clwan smart fed and .over and go to school on time. Managed this with my mum's help and husband and my own sheer grit. My guitar is beginning to wane so hoping this medication works to lift me from this hole x
 
Bod

Bod

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As you might well know then when working supporting others, intrusive thoughts are only that Thoughts and they can not hurt us at all as long as we never act on any of them. They can seem so real and can really mess with our heads but we have to try and snap out of it and then they pass us by.
 
L

LouieLou

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Sep 1, 2021
Messages
126
Location
Wales
As you might well know then when working supporting others, intrusive thoughts are only that Thoughts and they can not hurt us at all as long as we never act on any of them. They can seem so real and can really mess with our heads but we have to try and snap out of it and then they pass us by.
Thank you bod, most of the training tbh was mostly academic and one thing they missed out overindulgence was intrusive thoughts! Thanks for your realistic explanation itsneen over 10 years since I worked in mental health. Left because the company wanted to halve the staff and push clients who were ill out to move on to other accommodation so they could take new clients at all costs even if pushing them towards recovery could push them to relapse. I have a conscious so I left the job.
 
Bod

Bod

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I used to work as a volunteer in the mental health and saw many a scary thing with some who had bad intrusive thoughts, then I had to move back to my parents. It is such a shame that the cuts always hit the mental health.
 
L

LouieLou

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Sep 1, 2021
Messages
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Wales
I used to work as a volunteer in the mental health and saw many a scary thing with some who had bad intrusive thoughts, then I had to move back to my parents. It is such a shame that the cuts always hit the mental health.
Then I know you know the carnage the major reduction in services had on services and most importantly clients x
 
Bod

Bod

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Yes I know exactly how it has effected many many people sadly and that is so wrong.
 
L

LouieLou

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Sep 1, 2021
Messages
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Wales
Well not much sleep with melatonin tablets last night due to storm and neigubour's alarm blaring. Felt the very slight feeling of annoyance, as much as if someone softly put their fingers to stroke my arm. The neighbour was oblivious to it as he has lost his hearing.

1st visit from crisis home treatment, say I have depression and anhedonia They were nice. Came when kids at school. Talked about how could not have always had depression hiding away since 2017 as held down busy job home family. They were in absolute agreement work related stress has triggered the major episode. I also asked whether could retry mirtzapine again, this evening they phoned and agreed stay on seroquel quetiapine 25mg morning 50mg lunchtime 100-125mg teatime or evening. Melatonin in 2mg to bed after sunset. Then they are going to prescribe Mirtzapine. Will find out more tomorrow. I think the hardest thing for me is accepting i have an illness that I cannot control or timetable my recovery. That as an intelligence masters educated woman I have been floored with barely a warning flag raised before it whipped up and hit me. Everything is such a battle atm but its because I'm ill. The crisis team challenged me by asking how would I treat a friend with a broken leg probably with more kindness as at least I'd see her injury. Some members of society when you have a mentally illness they underestimate impact of symptoms that you can magically calm down pull yourself together talk yourself around all on your own. I wish that not just for myself but for my kids, my husband, my mum, my true friends that have bothered to check in. I think this time around it will test my resolve in human kindness but I think after an episode in 2017 I know who my friends are by now x

If you are reading my journey I hope it helps you to know your not alone. I am in my 1st day of recovery and know there are going to be good days and awfully date days x
 
L

LouieLou

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Sep 1, 2021
Messages
126
Location
Wales
Crisis home treatment late today went to wrong address. For a moment I felt angry as I felt today I wanted to talk about my recovery and restarting Mirtzapine alongside the new high dose of Seroquel Quetiapine. Feel today just want to go back to bed a slurring mixing up my words. I feel like I am in a mixed mood where I feel I'm stronger then thinking what a f^&King mess i am due to this illness the angry at my mind for being ill. I cannot understand somewhatwhen we say in passing mind body and soul. My body and soul wants to recover but my mind is very ill. Still waiting for her to come up at least during covid she has decided to continue working. My brain is slow today. I think the treatment team have told my mum and husband its going to take a long time for me to recover andbeable to manage. The melatonin tablet worked better last night slept form 9:30 to 2:25 and then again off and one till 9:30. Crisis treatmemt were meant to visit by 10 still haven't turned up.
 
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