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Abruptly losing motivation and don't know what to do

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Smartbutdumb

Member
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Dec 13, 2020
Messages
23
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India
So yesterday, I had shared a post here and I got really kind replies from people here and honestly, it made me feel a little better; like a weight was lifted off my chest.

I had a tough morning at work today and even though I was in a very strong mind to just ditch work, I faced everything and dealt with it. Which is quite okay and since it's been dealt with, I don't need to worry for a while.

I was feeling reasonably okay since the morning- handling my work okay-ish. I received a bit of heat from my direct superiors but that's fair because I was lagging behind at my work (I had 3-4 days of on-going depressive episodes). I would be lying if I said that I don't worry that I will be sacked.

A lot is riding on this job, to be honest. This job is my ticket to get out of the city. It's well paid and the work culture is good but most importantly, this job lets me finally leave the city and be financially independent. If I lose this, it'll be a huge set-back in my life. I know that. I recognize that and I am willing to do what it takes to change the current scenario. At times, I am even positive about it.

I am willing to work on it... but just now, I don't know what happened, but I felt that switch flip in me and suddenly I can't do it anymore. Everything is too much and I am very overwhelmed again. I feel dumb and inconspicuous. I feel like I am being looked down upon and that there is no chance that I am going to get through this. I feel extremely demotivated and trapped and all of this is happening in a matter of just an hour. I was just fine an hour ago.

Anything anyone says feels like an attack and I am generally good at taking criticisms but not in these times. Any hint of criticism and I feel like there is no way I can get back up and face the world.

I feel unworthy and quite frankly plain shitty.

Is there anything that can be done about this?
 
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Purpleplum

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Are you on any meds for this?
Do you have past trauma?
 
S

Smartbutdumb

Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2020
Messages
23
Location
India
Are you on any meds for this?
Do you have past trauma?
I am not on any medication, no. As about trauma, I can't say that I have any trauma in this specific zone. In general, I do think everyone has varying degrees of trauma and I have my share too, but nothing I could relate to this. At least nothing that I can remember.
 
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Purpleplum

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 7, 2020
Messages
2,027
Location
nowhere
I am not on any medication, no. As about trauma, I can't say that I have any trauma in this specific zone. In general, I do think everyone has varying degrees of trauma and I have my share too, but nothing I could relate to this. At least nothing that I can remember.
I think an SSRI medicine could help but it's just my opinion.
Also therapy could help.
 

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