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A Case Study on loneliness

R

reedjos08

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Today instead of pouring my heart out I would like to pose a question; why do we have friends? For this I’m going to ask you to step out of your perspective and simple thinking and step into the critical and the broad. Many of you might even be there already.

Friendship is an idea that develops early, as soon as we are exposed to the word and people to call friends. But why do we have them? The obvious answer is so we don’t get lonely but then there’s another question, why do we get lonely? I want to look at this from an evolutionary angle instead of a personal one.

Why, thousands of years ago, when we were nothing but hunter gathers with no internet, no forums and no shoulders to cry on online, why did we develop loneliness? Loneliness is not a physical attribute, it’s a mental tick that exists in us instinctively. We don’t learn to be lonely, we just feel it. Just like anything it has an evolutionary benefit; similar to how babies are cute to us because that makes us want to protect them.

Imagine you’re a Neanderthal or a Homo-Sapien, what is the benefit of other people? Simple, safety in numbers. Safety from other beings both of your own kind and of other species. Other people who can craft tools, cook, hunt and protect you. Now we then assume loneliness came from a fear of separation and isolation. If we are alone, we’re weak, therefore we developed loneliness as a way to make ourselves find others to defend us.

So today, why do we have loneliness? Well the same reason we have patriarchy and classicism and racism, because they’re out of date instincts that are rooted into out evolution. Women were weaker physically so they were the cooks; even though base physicality is now irrelevant this still persists. We saw things that were different to us as dangerous, so someone who was alien to us instinctively became a threat. Loneliness is similar, a social tick we developed when loneliness kept us alive but now all it does is bring us down.

My life and the lives of others would be so much better if loneliness wasn't something we can’t help. In my opinion it’s something that once benefited us but now we don’t need others to stay alive it keeps us down. If I could stop feeling alone I would but it’s hard wired and unavoidable, I have to deal with that every day.
 
Jaminacaranda

Jaminacaranda

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Personally I don't believe in evolutionary psychology except in the sense that - like many other mammalian species - humans appear to derive comfort from physical contact. Intimate/sexual relationships provide this and in the absence of these, friendships are the next best thing. With none of these, most people (but not all) feel uncomfortable/distressed.
 
life2live

life2live

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Harry Harlow a so called scientist used monkeys to experiment with the effect of isolation. This included rearing infant monkeys in isolation chambers for up to 24 months, from which they emerged severely disturbed. We are social creatures we need interaction, we crave it. Loneliness is the effect of isolation.
 
BillFish

BillFish

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Today instead of pouring my heart out I would like to pose a question; why do we have friends? For this I’m going to ask you to step out of your perspective and simple thinking and step into the critical and the broad. Many of you might even be there already.

Friendship is an idea that develops early, as soon as we are exposed to the word and people to call friends. But why do we have them? The obvious answer is so we don’t get lonely but then there’s another question, why do we get lonely? I want to look at this from an evolutionary angle instead of a personal one.

Why, thousands of years ago, when we were nothing but hunter gathers with no internet, no forums and no shoulders to cry on online, why did we develop loneliness? Loneliness is not a physical attribute, it’s a mental tick that exists in us instinctively. We don’t learn to be lonely, we just feel it. Just like anything it has an evolutionary benefit; similar to how babies are cute to us because that makes us want to protect them.

Imagine you’re a Neanderthal or a Homo-Sapien, what is the benefit of other people? Simple, safety in numbers. Safety from other beings both of your own kind and of other species. Other people who can craft tools, cook, hunt and protect you. Now we then assume loneliness came from a fear of separation and isolation. If we are alone, we’re weak, therefore we developed loneliness as a way to make ourselves find others to defend us.

So today, why do we have loneliness? Well the same reason we have patriarchy and classicism and racism, because they’re out of date instincts that are rooted into out evolution. Women were weaker physically so they were the cooks; even though base physicality is now irrelevant this still persists. We saw things that were different to us as dangerous, so someone who was alien to us instinctively became a threat. Loneliness is similar, a social tick we developed when loneliness kept us alive but now all it does is bring us down.

My life and the lives of others would be so much better if loneliness wasn't something we can’t help. In my opinion it’s something that once benefited us but now we don’t need others to stay alive it keeps us down. If I could stop feeling alone I would but it’s hard wired and unavoidable, I have to deal with that every day.
I find periods of aloneness to be great for my well being, traveling around in my car taking photographs, stopping for breaks at beauty spots and contemplating life etc . Particularly as a schizophrenic my mind is usually buzzing with voices and thoughts, but I loathe long periods of loneliness, but I have a vibrant, good humored household to return to.

But on the subject of isolation, I have experienced being put in solitary confinement in an army jail, I had no sense of time, no window, and the guards refused to communicate with me, just quietly pushed food and water through the hatch.It was only for four days, but I was left with the sensation that I had been walking through a desert for a week when they let me out.I can only wonder what it's like in max security jails where prisoners can be put in solitary for twelve years.:eek2::peace:
 
A

Alienated

Guest
I have lived in isolation for 8 years... People think I am crazy as Hell.. But that's cool, I spent that time actually studying and KNOW they are cazy as HELL.

Isolation or not people are self-destructive, so I guess it's wether or not your a team player.. :eek2:
 
maybe.shes.a.wildflower

maybe.shes.a.wildflower

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I think I'm a freak as I'm happy being alone but I'm stuck in a relationship, I have a son too and I'm sure I'd miss him but if I hadn't got myself into this mess I'm sure I'd be happier just me vs the world, or atleast happier than this.
 
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