- Mar 25, 2020
- Regina Saskatchewan
I'm wasting away from this depression. I spend day in day out in a state of anxiety, fear and sadness filled with thoughts of loved ones dieing, seeing nice old people driving by and then thinking they might pass away soon from there age, thoughts of my dog passing away or thinking of some of the family members I've lost or getting intrusive thoughts what if I lost my mind and injured myself or someone else and stuck on those horrible thoughts and feelings that make u sick to ur gut. My mind is so targeted and latched on to this depressing state. I use to take an antidepressant but I find it only worked for a few years. I've had a few prescriptions of Klonopin but honestly they just make me tired and don't help my mood. I can't even go to a job interview I'm stuck inside I hate to be so down but the switch in my brain is off! I tried taking Klonopin before a job interview thinking it would help me not get all panicky but it didn't do anything for me mentally and I just said screw it I can't work I give up. I just turned 29 and this misery has not gone away. So what should I do clearly my brain is not getting any healthier I might as well pick a drug weather it's a pain killer or whatever so I can atleast not feel this guilt and horrible sensation. I've gone 4 while years and every SINGLE day was just depression and anxiety that's no way to live why not do drugs.... Like I have anything better going on with this life.