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1st Councelling session 2moz??????

N

Nutter_09

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Mar 11, 2009
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:confused::confused:

Hi all,
I have FINALLY got an appointment for councelling through (this is not an NHS one thou - its a charity one - still waiting for the NHS to help!!)
I have been for a brief assesment which was messed up as either they, or I got the app wrong. I am now worried as to what to expect.
Brief background is i have been suffering with depression on and off for a few years, since the death of my Nan. It was very traumatic and I took it badly. I have had confidence and image issues for as long as I can remember. I have also had problems with work life - some employees have treated me badly when I had not deserved it.
I am currently unemployed after being signed off for 6 weeks, they would fire me so I got their first.
Since being off work - I have felt much better and not had panic/anxiety but now I have no savings etc I need to get myself together, and now am going downhill again.

My main Question is what do I do tomorrow for the councelling - I know they talk and ask questions but I feel like i can't explain properly and don't make sence.
Will they know how to figure it all out - should I take anything? Write a list of feelings etc??


Sorry to ramble on soo much!!


Thanx
 
nickh

nickh

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Yes :). It is a very good idea to...

1.) write down beforehand the main things that you want to say and take them in with you.
2.) take a notebook and pen in with you so you can jot stuff down during the session.

Now at a first session basically the counsellor should just be listening to you. The first session is always difficult so don't worry about finding it so. And if it is any good then it will be very tiring too (I still feel drained after a psychotherapy session and thats after well over 50!:)).

I really hope that you do get on well with your counsellor and you feel that they are able to help you - but do bear in mind that for many people it takes quite a time to find the 'right' counsellor/therapist for them in terms of both the approach and the individual. So if (and I hope this doesn't happen) it doesn't work out don't get disheartened.

Very best of luck and let us know how you get on.

Best,

Nick.
 
N

Nutter_09

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Thanks for the advice,
Still at home - app not till7 so just having a good think!

Will let you know how I get on.

Thanks again.
 
invise

invise

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Hey, guessing your there just now. Hope everything went ok.
 
H

Honey

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Hi, Hope all went well.
I see a NHS counceller and have been for a year or more, its nothing to worry about, dont worry if you havent been able to say all you have wanted or havent explained properly, theres time. Once you have been seeing your counceller for a while, they will feel more like your friend and you;ll be able to explain better and talk easier.
to be honest my councelling hasnt worked much, and hasnt really helped me much but its nice to have that person there to talk to, who isnt in your family.
Good Luck.
 
L

Lionheart

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Hope you are good.

I have been waiting to see a therapist with the NHS for 2/3 years now myself. I have had an initial assessment and I will be honest, I was scared to death the lady would think of me as a messed up 20 something guy. But after I told her things that happen in my head that I don't like talking about, I found the lady diden't judge me and was very supportive and just like the big sister I never had.
It is hard to tell people things but therapists are definately the right people, mine is already reminding me that she is changing my life for the better and I beleave her. :)
 
nickh

nickh

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Delighted to hear that Lionheart - its important that people post positive as well as negative experiences because it gives hope :).

Nick.
 
N

Nutter_09

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Thats great - i think it depends on the person and the problems.
I haven't felt like posting for a while but it went okay.
Had a good chat and cry. Going again tomorrow so see how that goes.
 
invise

invise

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Good to hear it went ok.

Hope tommorrows the same and you get something useful out of it.
All the best
 
nickh

nickh

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Glad to hear it went OK. Hope todays session is alright too :).

Nick.
 
N

Nutter_09

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Went okay yest.
I'm starting to think that she wants to make me cry---It was better than last time, we just chatted about my home life and work etc but she keeps coming back to my main issue with grief.
I lost my Nan 4 years ago and was their at the end so have been quite traumatised so she thinks and never actually grieved. I cant speak about it with her or anyone without becoming very emotional and angry - she said we will "crack it" later but keeps slipping a few questions in. I am starting to think that I am just not ready to deal with it.

Also, my main question is should I speak with my mum? The counsellour picked up a lot about my relationship that I have never thought of. My mum does not think I am depressed and hates me taking meds - she does not understand but wont admit this - just covers it up by saying im "ill" or being silly etc. Don't get me wrong, we have a great relationship and she is great but the counsellor thinks my mum has her own issues and from when I was a baby she sees me as the "sickly" one as my sister is always healthy and from birth, I had problems with my heart etc and am sick more than others. She picked up on how my mum is negative a lot of the time and that maybe she dies not want to accept that i have a problem. She hates the fact that I was signed off and now not working. She lends me money then gets angry!

This all makes sense now but mum askes me how the counselling went so I just say I dont wanna talk about it - how can I tell her all these things??
A close friend of mine has also picked up on this but I love my mum dealry and even though this is soo true, I dont wanna hurt her.

:mad: :mad: :mad:
 
nickh

nickh

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First off Nutter have a look at this thread which is going on now....

http://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/showthread.php?t=4587

because a lot of the problems you discuss about the hardness of therapy are being discussed there - I won't repeat what's been said there in detail - in summary good therapy is really hard but is ultimately worth it :).

The question about your mum is much harder. I think you need to talk to your counsellor about this before you say anything to your mum. My instinct (and it is just that - we are not professionals here which is why you should talk about it to the counsellor) is that at the moment you would probably not be ready for this right now. But that's purely a personal and un-informed feeling.

Nick.
 

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