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19 and afraid that I am a narcissist. How do I know if I am and what steps should I take?

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okcomputer123

New member
Joined
Nov 15, 2020
Messages
1
Location
Netherlands
Hello everyone,

I am a 19 year old male and I am afraid that I suffer from narcissistic personality disorder.

I base this thought on a few things: The first thing being that I have a hard time feeling emotion, I barely cry (1-2 times a year max) and when I do it is because of a show, movie etc. and not about something personal.

The second thing is that I tend to lie very easily. I do feel regret after but in the moment it just happens. I lie to, for example, make my family’s financial situation seem slightly better than it is, enhance my achievements (Lying about grades) and more of the sort.

My 3rd big point is relationships, I have a fine relationship with my parents but often don’t really listen to a lot of what they have to say. My relationship with my siblings is also on good terms but we’re not togheter a lot and it feels superficial. I have a pretty big group of friends and have about 4 that I am a really close to. One of them seems very toxic to me and I suspect her of being a narcissist however I dont have the guts to confront her and let her walk over me most of the time just shutting up when she is being toxic (she calls me narcissistic and I laugh it off), thinking that I might be the narcissist here and that she isnt at fault. People do say to me that I am the life of the party and I do feel some sort of love and empathy for most of the friends but theres a lot of logical thinking behing it instead of feelings.

4th being that, especially during quarantine I was (and still am but I am busier now again) quite obsessed with my looks and look in the mirror a lot. I barely cared at first but now have a whole skincare routine, do my hair etc. There was a sudden switch in that during quarantine.

those are the big four points that I noticed while trying to self reflect. Idk what I should do because I have a hard time being vulnerable to people close to me and my family doesn’t have the money for therapy. Hopefully someone here can help.

Also thanks for reading those whole lot of text if your still here :)

Kind regards
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
13,347
Location
Nowhere
hi okcomputer :welcome: !

not sure if any of that qualifies you as a narcissist
thing is we can't really diagnose that here
you might be able to get a free appointment with a psychiatrist

and don't rule out therapy
there might be financial assistance available
for people who are really dedicated to their recovery
bursaries , sliding scales and the like

start speaking to doctors about your need for help
never mind the diagnosis for now they will tell you that



:grouphug:
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
3,844
Location
USA
Hi @okcomputer123

Honestly,what you've said doesn't sound anything at all like NPD. Really.

Hugs
 
Intareseid

Intareseid

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 7, 2020
Messages
67
Location
Somewhere I don't belong.
Everything you wrote in my opinion just describes about 90% of teenagers and about 70% of humanity overall.

Also, the fact that you're so concerned about this possibility that you registered here and made this thread is just about the opposite behavior from narcissism. True narcissists, and you also seem to be mixing up some sociopathy there, wouldn't really care if they are such.

You do seem to be a bit of an over-thinker, maybe there's some anxiety issues there? that may be worth exploring. But no, nothing of what you wrote gives any hint towards you being a narcissist.
 
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