You can PM me if you want.
Hello, everyone. My name is Morrow (a screen name, obviously) and I stumbled upon this sub-forum when looking for someone to talk to.
A few years ago I was diagnosed with depression and in the middle of last year I was put on medication. I've now been put onto a new batch, and while I've only been on it for about a week now, my body is still trying to adapt to it. I won't go into full details, but I assume some of you know exactly when I'm talking about (extreme hunger, fatigue, insomnia, etc.)
But, that's not the reason I'm here. At least, I don't think it is.
I'm going through a pretty tough time at the moment with life and work. My finances feel like a wreck and I have a massive chunk of debt from a previous business, but I'm at least paying it off, albeit slowly. There's also my credit card which I need to use at times, but still feels like a boulder around my neck.
My family is going through their own problems, which I don't want to discuss here, but it's eating away at me.
Work is basically hell right now. I do part of what I enjoy (writing), but the subject matter and my boss are pretty shitty. He is a massive problem in the company with regards to shouting and swearing at people, unrealistic deadlines, and generally being an asshole. Unfortunately it's not something that can be reported as it's just constantly ignored (he's not self reflective at all). The boss also downright refuses to hire more people after a few left and we're all doing the work of four to five individuals. I also can't just walk out because I need the money and there's very little in the job market at the moment. He is back from leave next week and the moment I think about him I get anxiety.
Oh, and I also have anxiety. Even as I writing this I'm sitting at my desk at work I'm shaking and struggling to hold back the tears. It keeps me up at night.
I don't feel like I can talk to anyone anymore about what's going on. I can see my friends get irritated with my messages, my family tries to outdo me in their woes, and my partner has their own problems and I don't want to add to them (not depression, though). I know that I can be a boulder around someone's neck with this, to use that image again.
I was going to a psychologist for a while, but it became too expensive.
I just need people to talk to, because I'm honestly feeling worthless and shitty and there's a lot riding on me right now.
You can PM me if you want.
Last edited by TiredTina; 12-01-17 at 13:45.
Maybe we're not meant to be fixed. Our brokenness refracts the Light in more beautiful ways.
Hi and welcome to the forum
Talking does help, have a look around the forum you will see you are not alone. Theres always someone around to listen.
What doesn't kill me makes me Stronger
Sorry you feel that way. Talk to me.