Heyy thankyou all for the replies so sorry i haven't had time to read them this week!
My new job is great and I'm hoping to go far so that's about the only good thing in my life atm. Oh ya and i finallyy got my puppy, called her Maddie for madison. She's my only love
Yes. I'm a fucking retard for 'working things out' with my bf. But what can i do? I ugh love him and i don't want to. I want to be alone and i know its not right the way I'm getting treated. I dont think that i deserve this and i know i can do much better.. so why the fuck am i here? I'm afraid that maybe he's right that I'm just using him for the roof over my head, the lifestyle of getting pretty much whatever i want. But i know im not the kind of person who would do that :S or maybe it really is this 'love' thing ...i keeo hearing that its crazy.. so why the fuck am i still here?? I dont know. Time will tell and whatever is meant to be will be..