My deal with the devil stopped today!

[skitzofrantik]

To day i ended my deal with the devil (methadone) had been on a heavy dose for nearly 3 years with for the majority of the time daily pick up until last 4/5 months, just never relised what a burden that is. went to the doctors today and just told him i was clean(long way to go though ), after a slight jaw drop he asked what did i mean lol, so i told him my anti pschs, methadone and trazodone basically the lot. by time i finshed saying what i had to i have never seen a doctor so affected by a patient he has seen me in all sorts of states but today just shocked him.
was such an awesome feeling and a sense of pride, he didnt question my sanity, think me dellusional or try and lock me up or put me on meds or try and force to have a psch eval, all he said was is i will do what ever i can to help, i just wanted to cry in shock that he hadnt bloody listened
i still find it amazing what trciks our minds play on us, and how far a little self belief and confidince can go

[jaxie40]

Khayos, I have tears in my eyes, I'm so happy for you! Seems weird because I don't know you personally, but it really sounds like you've had a lot to deal with and work through. I hope you're very proud of yourself hun, because you damn well should be

[skitzofrantik]

Khayos, I have tears in my eyes, I'm so happy for you! Seems weird because I don't know you personally, but it really sounds like you've had a lot to deal with and work through. I hope you're very proud of yourself hun, because you damn well should be

thankyou for such kind words trying to keep postive and a sense of pride, i just know the little bastard called the devil is stil going to be perched firmly on my shoulder though for the next few months, but for me addiction is 90% psychological and i have well and truly ripped burned and then kicked to about 9th universe along lol, i just hope i dont reincarnate there would be just my fucking luck lol.

[jaxie40]

You know none of us on here would let you fall again if we could possibly help it hun. I know it's going to be an ongoing battle, just like it is for me with my ED. Just stay strong hun, and believe in yourself

[sandies]

well done khayos
i can picture u now
standing on a mountain top sword in hand ready for battle (shouting charge) and the little demon
trembling running scared ;-)
all the best with the fight
san xx

[jaxie40]

well done khayos
i can picture u now
standing on a mountain top sword in hand ready for battle (shouting charge) and the little demon
trembling running scared ;-)
all the best with the fight
san xx

That's just created the most funny picture in my head

[skitzofrantik]

well done khayos
i can picture u now
standing on a mountain top sword in hand ready for battle (shouting charge) and the little demon
trembling running scared ;-)
all the best with the fight
san xx

wow ty lol you forgot the kilt :-P

just put a huge smile on my face as for fighting i spent so long using it on myself lol, just nice to be able to turn the tables on the demons

[sandies]

glad i made u smile.
u deserve it.

xxx

[jaxie40]

Hey khayos. How ya doing hun?

[skitzofrantik]

shit will try and find time to post more, ty for asking