Three months in

[tallynats]

Just want to start by saying I like this forum, as much as I don't wish bad upon any of you, it's nice to know Im not alone.

I've heard whispers for a couple of years, nothing I could distinguish though. About three months ago was the first time they spoke directly to me. And it has been non stop ever since. It takes me a long time to get a sentence out let alone hold a conversation with someone. My brain isn't mine anymore. Writing is a little easier. Im not sure why. I don't know if I can tell you what they say, I don't want consequences.

Im already facing harsh ones for telling the early intervention team. Im not sure I could handle anymore.

I cant sleep. They get louder at night. I can't trust the people I love anymore.

Im going to have to leave it there, my concentration has apparently ran out. Sorry.

[Ainsworth]

voices are horrible, i have this myself but there is hope. learning to take the power away from them is the first step, its hard but can be done. what are your support team putting in place to help you with this?

i have had no help, over the years its got easier and even though they are still around they dont bother me unless im severely unwell. i ignore them, use music etc. you need to find something that helps you when they are bad.

[tallynats]

I have an appointment with a psychiatrist on Wednesday. It will be my first. Until then they've left crisis numbers with my mum and told her to keep an eye on me, she said.

[Ainsworth]

good luck with the appointment. i hope it helps you. if you think it will help, write thing down and take it with you, i know when i get in the room i forget things.

[tallynats]

Thank you. I think I'll try writing things down if I have the courage.

[Foxjo]

Hi babe,
i really feel for you, voices are horrible. they want you to do awful things and we know its not you, its not your fault.
You really do need to tell your MH team, i know your voices will tell you not to but if you tell someone they will not have as much power over you. I know- thats what i do. My voices come to me at night when im tired- they tell me to hurt myself.

I was keeping it to myself as i didnt want my husband to think i was 'mad'. but one day i told him i told him that 'they' wanted me to hurt myself. he stayed with me so that they didnt get to me.
Now i feel i have some control over them -they cannot control me as much! !

just a thought- have you got an mp3 player you could listen to some music if the voices are talking away to you?
Keep strong and keep talking
Fox x

[tallynats]

I'm trying to talk to them, but it's so hard. I never know who to listen to, y'know? And even when I choose to listen to the right people in person I can hardly take anything they say in because the voices babble over them. Feel so trapped all the time.

I honestly haven't thought about the possibility music could help. I will definitely try that. Thank you.

[Foxjo]

People on the forum suggested that to me. i do try and listen to music or distract myself if the voices are there with me.
it takes some patience and practice.
please try not to be so hard on yourself.
are the voices your own or are they someone else?

[tallynats]

Someone else I think.

[Foxjo]

i do think you should write down how you are and give it to your mental health team. They are there to help you.
YES the voices wont like it - but you dont want to be controlled by the voices do you- you want them to be reduced or at best you want them to go away. If you stay quiet thats what they want and thats how they will get stronger.
You have reached out to us for help. you have been so brave to do that.
please keep strong
x