I've smoked weed on an off for many years now very casually, no more than the average person drinks booze. Drink has never been my thing.
Recently (i'd rather not specify how long but long enough) i've been smoking more and more to cope with my ever worsening problems, mainly anxiety issues, depression, social phobias and insomnia that i've had most my life. It's helped when i've been at my most down in ways medication has never been able to.
Well the problem is now i've been smoking long enough consistantly (I mean all the time) to have found myself in a hole with what I know pure and simple to be addiction and had no idea until I run out.
My bad dreams are even worse and more vivid (and they're normally very much both without this anyway), I cannot eat, without it don't sleep with any consistancy, when I do get half an hour asleep I wake dripping with sweat. I'm feeling classic "grief response" symptoms too, sadness, tears etc.
I know i'm stupid for letting myself get like this and that the reason I smoke it are reasons I shouldn't, as someone with a father with chronic long term alcohol problems and has an addictive personality I should have known better.
Just wondered what other people in my situation have been through and if they've told their doctor what happened, obviously i'm worried he will make the usual assumtion that the drugs caused the problems i've had all these years when they all came first, i'd have never ended up like this if I hadn't spent so many years with the issues that plague me. Did you go through a doc or straight to a community drugs program? Were you prescribed anything to detox?
It's just now without the drugs all the problems that were there are worse and I just can't afford it anymore, financially or healthwise, in terms of depression and insomnia i'd be ok with a good cheap supply but the way it makes me want to hide indoors more nowdays can't be a good thing, plus the running low part adds unnecessary anxiety
The trouble is the taboo of it being drugs, even tho alcohol is also a more dangerous drug as it's legal somehow it's always treated differently in these types of situations.
Any wise words appreciated, no debates please though I know some people passionately hate drugs and people who take them.